Tales from Pete's World 11 – And I'm Humming My Way Back To You Babe
by SciFiFanForever
Summary: After visiting some old friends, the new recruit Amy discovers a real life mystery that no one has found an answer to. Metacrisis Doctor John Smith reckons it's about time someone did.
1. Celebrity

**Authors Note:** **Thanks to Alpha007 for the suggestion and the challenge to write about this real life mystery. It starts with a bit of scene building for later, so stick with it.**

 **Chapter 1**

 **Celebrity**

 **Mall Road.**

 **Hammersmith, London.**

 **2007.**

Rose Tyler opened the official looking letter and read it with a sigh of relief. At last, she was divorced from her philandering husband. Her mum had never liked him, telling her that he was a "wrong 'n". Talking of her mum, it was her day off from the salon today and she wanted to go over and have a cup of tea and a catch up.

She put the letter in her shoulder bag and left her small, luxury flat which overlooked the Thames. It was a bit pricey, but worth it for the view and the proximity to her place of work.

'MUM? I'M HERE,' Rose called out as she arrived in the hallway of her parents flat.

'Oh Sweetheart. There you are. How are ya?' Jackie said as she pulled her into a hug.

'I'm fine Mum,' Rose told her as she reached into her bag. 'And, I'm a lot better since I got this.' She held out the official looking envelope.

'Is that it? The decree absolute?'

'Yeah. I'm finally rid of him,' Rose said with a satisfied smile.

'About time too. I bet you're glad you kept your maiden name. Saves havin' to change everythin' back again,' Jackie told her.

'Well, yeah. But that wasn't the real reason. I mean, I wasn't expectin' to get a divorce when I got married.'

'I was,' Jackie retorted.

'Okay Mum. I know you told me so. But the reason I kept my maiden name was because that's the name the public know me by. My manager said it would be easier, and all the celebrities do it.'

'Ooh. Hark at you havin' a manager,' Jackie teased. 'I still can't believe how your life has turned around.'

'I know. I still have to pinch myself sometimes.'

'Sit yerself down an' I'll make the tea.'

Jackie went through to the kitchen, and Rose sat on the sofa which faced the patio door and the balcony. She looked on the low, glass table and saw blueprints and documents. 'How's Dad doin'? Where is he today?'

Jackie came through from the kitchen with two mugs of tea. 'Oh, that's what I was gonna tell ya. He's gone to a meeting with one of the big house buildin' companies. They want to use his new solar roof tiles on all of their new houses,' she said excitedly.

'Oh Mum. That's brilliant!'

'I know. If he gets the contract it'll mean we can buy that house we've had our eye on.'

'I told you I'd help you with that,' Rose reminded her.

'I know Sweetheart. An' me and yer dad were really grateful of the offer, but y'know we like to make our own way in the world. And now it looks like we can.' Jackie handed her daughter a mug of tea.

'That's great Mum. I'm really pleased for ya. And yer salon's doin' well an' all.'

'Yeah, I know. I've got some really talented stylists now and the word's spreadin'. We're really busy . . . Hey, as yer here, shall I put the DVD on,' Jackie asked with an expectant smile.

Rose feigned a groan. 'Oh go on then. If ya must.' She was pretending to be reluctant, but in reality, she enjoyed watching her 2004 Olympic performance. It was the interviews afterwards that made her cringe.

'Here we are then,' Jackie said, pressing the play button on the remote.

['And next up in the floor exercise is our medal hopeful Rose Tyler,'] the commentator started. ['A popular young lady with a cheeky smile and bubbly personality. Let's see if that comes through in her performance.']

['Yes. That's right Michael. She just missed out on a medal in Sydney due to her inexperience. She was only fourteen then. But she's back now and showing bags of confidence. I think we're in for a treat if the preliminaries are anything to go by.']

Jackie and Rose watched as she started to move around the mat like a Gazelle, with a variety of flips, handstands, and rolls. As it came towards the end of her performance she executed a series of back flips across the mat, culminating in a triple somersault before landing perfectly with an enormous smile on her face and spreading her arms out with a flourish. The crowd erupted in applause and cheers.

Jackie clapped her hands together. 'Oh I love that bit!'

Rose gave her a grin. 'Yeah. I did kinda cream it, didn't I?'

They watched the end of the performance as they sipped their teas, and it came to the scores.

['Now, the Romanian Cătălina Ponor scored nine point seven five from all six judges. Rose only needs to get a nine point eight from one of the judges and she's got the gold.']

They watched the scores going up on the display, with Rose on the split screen watching with her coach. Nine point eight from the Swiss judge. They saw Rose jump up and down with delight, hugging her coach. Nine point seven five . . . Nine point seven five . . . And then there was nine point six from the Mexican judge. On the split screen, Rose's face fell. The gold might just have been snatched away from her. Two more nine point seven fives put the nail in the gold medal coffin.

They heard the crowd start booing, and a slow hand clap started to fill the stadium. The split screen went to a single screen of the eighteen year old Rose sobbing her heart out in the arms of her coach.

['Was that judge watching the same performance we were?'] one of the commentators asked.

'No he weren't,' Jackie told the television. Rose smiled at her mother's indignation.

['He couldn't have been,'] the other commentator agreed. [' That was a near flawless performance, and the crowd know it. Listen to them. Of course, it isn't the first time the judging has been controversial at these Olympics.']

['Yes. When the Russian Alexei Nemov was scored low in the horizontal bar, the crowd booed for fifteen minutes.']

'Yer not gonna make me watch the interviews are ya?' Rose asked.

'Oh but they were the best bits Sweetheart. The whole nation was behind ya. They could see what it meant to ya,' Jackie said.

'I know. But my eyes were all puffy and red, and I was so nervous. I kept fiddlin' with my hair all the time.'

'Yeah. But that's what won everyone's hearts.'

Rose remembered how the networks had interviewed her and her coach. They all thought she should have won the gold. Ironically, it was this injustice which changed her life. If she had won the gold, she wouldn't have been approached by a publicist who helped her sell her story. All the tabloids ran the story, and she was invited to appear on the prime time Graham Norton Show.

She really liked Graham, and she came over really well. The council estate girl who gave it her all and was cheated when she was about to achieve her goal. Graham had seen her potential as a television celebrity and advised her to get an agent. Her agent got her more chat show appearances and a regular spot on Question Of Sport. She stormed those appearances, and was offered the job of presenting the show when the existing presenter moved on.

It was at this time that her boyfriend of six months had decided to ask her to marry him. The publicity and the celebrity profile would do his image and career no end of good. And it did, but it didn't stop him from choosing to continuing his affair with Noosh Jansen, the daughter of the band's manager.

Jackie smiled at her daughter. 'It's funny how things turn out dependin' on the choices y'make, innit.'

'And the choices other people make for ya, yeah.'

* * *

 **Curiosity Research Vessel.**

 **Approaching Beta Pegasi II.**

 **196 light years from Earth.**

'Mayday! Mayday! This is Captain Raffaela Ottean of the research vessel Curiosity,' the woman called into the communications panel.

['Roger that Captain. This is Convex Twenty Two traffic control. What is the nature of your emergency?'] a calm voice replied.

'We have had a catastrophic failure of our power system. We've managed to steer towards a level one habitable planet. We are abandoning ship. Repeat. We are abandoning ship.'

['Understood Captain. You are abandoning ship. I am initiating the emergency rescue protocol. Please make sure your emergency beacon is active. I can confirm that there are three vessels within fifty light years of your location.']

'Thank you control. We await rescue. Over and out.'

Raffaela shut down the panel and looked around the bridge. All five crew members were rushing around gathering emergency equipment and supplies to take to the escape pod.

'Come on. You'll have to leave the rest, we're already skimming the atmosphere.'

They ran down the passageway to the airlock and climbed into the compact pod, each person strapping themselves in and locking their helmets in place. Raffaela pulled the door lock lever, and it slid seamlessly into place.

The control panel came to life, and the pilot grabbed the joystick. 'All systems online. Ready to jettison on my mark. In three . . . two . . . one. Release!'

Raffaela pulled a handle towards her and all their stomachs went into their mouths as pod went into free fall.

'Yeeehaaa!' the pilot exclaimed as he fought to keep the pod on a controlled descent vector. 'There's a forest down there. I'm going to try and skim the canopy to soften the landing.'

'Do it,' Raffaela commanded. It started to get bumpy as they hit turbulence, and it soon became a roller-coaster ride. Cracking, zinging noises could be heard from the hull as the pod hit the forest canopy and skidded to a halt.

'Everyone okay?' Raffaela asked. Each crew member signed off, and when she was happy that everyone was uninjured, she popped the hatch.

The tear-drop hatch slid down and a number of branches and vines sprung inwards. Raffaela removed her helmet and unfastened her seat harness, before climbing out of her seat and bending the branches out of the pod. She froze when she saw a pair of natives watching her with interest.

'Oh. Hello . . . Don't-be-afraid,' she said slowly. 'We-are-travellers-from . . .' Probably best not to tell them from the stars. 'A-long-way-away. This-is-our-ship, sort-of.' She was trying to use gestures to give meaning to her words.

The natives looked at each other and frowned, before grinning and looking back in her direction. "Oh dear, This is worse than I thought," she thought to herself. "The natives are idiots!"

* * *

 **The Bell Public House.**

 **Hillgrove Street.**

 **Stokes Croft, Bristol.**

It was nine o'clock in the evening, and The Bell Public House was jumping to the music of the live band. The Bell was a bustling city centre pub, hidden away just off the main strip. Stokes Croft had developed into a self-named Cultural Quarter that supported street art and all things made locally. Consequently, a lot of the customers were artist, street artist, and musicians.

'Excuse me,' a young woman asked hesitantly. 'Are you "Legs" from the Torchwood programme?'

Amy Williams looked up and gave an embarrassed smile. 'Er, yeah. That's me.' Amy and her husband Rory had been invited on a long weekend to Bristol by their old friends, Paul and Stephanie.

'I knew it. I said to Sean it was you. Sean's my boyfriend,' the young lady told her excitedly. Amy looked past her to see a young man sitting at one of the traditional wooden tables, giving her a wave. 'Could I be cheeky and ask for your autograph?' She held out a pen, and a copy of Total TV Guide, which had a picture of Blue Watch on the cover, for Amy to sign.

Rory snorted a laugh and nearly choked on his pint of real ale as Amy gave the young woman a warm smile. 'Of course you can. Who shall I dedicate it to?'

She had never minded being the centre of attention. After all, she had been a successful kissogram in the Cotswolds before being spotted by Doctor Smith and becoming a Special Operations Agent. As a kissogram though, she could be fairly anonymous. Now however, she was a member of an internationally known institute, and the public had followed her training with interest.

'Oh. To Liv and Sean please,' Liv said with obvious delight. Amy signed the front cover of the magazine, and Liv went back to her table to show her trophy to her boyfriend.

'Does that happen very often?' their friend Stephanie asked.

'Now and again,' Amy laughed.

'Mind you, you always liked being the centre of attention when you were at school,' their friend Paul reminded her.

'What d'ya mean "the centre of attention"?' Amy asked indignantly.

'Methinks the lady doth protest too much,' Rory said cheekily.

'And methinks my husband doth get a knuckle sandwich if he don't shut his gob,' Amy replied with a smirk.

Rory and Paul had been to school together in Leadworth, and had both attended the University of the West of England in Bristol, where Rory studied to be a nurse, and Paul had studied Music Technology. When Rory qualified as a nurse, he returned to Leadworth and to the love of his life, Amy.

Paul had met Bristolian Stephanie at UWE, and when Amy came to stay with Rory at weekends, they all became firm friends. Paul decided to stay in Bristol when he qualified, and got a job as a sound engineer at BBC Radio Bristol. When Rory and Amy had a long weekend off shift, they had taken up Paul and Steph's invitation to spend the weekend with them in Bristol, where they could visit all their old favourite haunts whilst staying in their comfortable spare room.

Their all time favourite haunt was the pub where they now found themselves. The classic central Bristol, wood-floored hostelry had an eclectic clientèle, being situated as it was in one of the most vibrant, contemporary, cosmopolitan communities known as Stokes Croft. There was an amazing range of local art adorning the walls, and the toilet graffiti art had to be seen to be believed!

'So how's life in London then?' Steph asked Amy as she had a sip of her wine. 'A bit different to sleepy old Leadworth, eh?'

'Yeah. It's great. A lot like Bristol, but all a bit bigger,' Amy told her.

'And I can't believe you're on the telly. You've really landed on your feet you two,' said Steph.

Rory finished supping his real ale and smiled at his wife. 'It's all down to Amy really, and to her parents living in a haunted house.'

'What? The old vicarage is haunted?' Paul asked in surprise.

'Welllll, sort of,' Amy said. 'But that was how I met Doctor Smith, and that was how he came to recommend me to Captain McNab at Torchwood.'

'Oh, that Doctor Smith, he looks SO cute on the telly. What are they like in real life, y'know, him and his wife Rose?' Steph asked her.

Amy gave a coy look to Rory before continuing. 'How do you say it in Bristol? He's gurt lush, and Rose is amazin'. They're a lovely couple, full of fun and mischief. And even though Rose is the Watch Supervisor, y'know, my boss, she's part of our girls night in on a Wednesday night.'

'And those medical facilities look pretty amazing,' Paul said to Rory.

'Oh you have no idea,' Rory said, having another gulp of his ale. 'They can't show you the high tech equipment on the show because it's all classified. But I can tell you it's like being on the set of Star Trek.'

Paul shook his head. 'That's incredible.'

* * *

 **Paul and Stephanie's House.**

 **Shirehampton, Bristol.**

The next morning in Paul and Steph's spare room, Amy rolled over towards her husband and climbed on top of him, straddling his hips. He roused from his slumber, and a boyish grin spread across his face as he realised what his gorgeous wife was about to do.

'Good morning my flame haired beauty,' he said, lifting his head off the pillow and kissing her on the lips.

'Mornin', my naughty nurse,' she replied with a grin of her own. She eased herself onto his erection and started to grind up and down. Rory lifted his pelvis up and down in rhythm to heighten the sensation and increase their pleasure. They quickly reached their climax, and Amy collapsed on top of him, kissing his neck and nibbling his ear.

She sniffed the air. 'I think we've overdone it Nurse Williams. Cos I can smell burnin',' she said with a giggle.

Rory laughed and sniffed the air himself. 'That's not burning . . . that's bacon!'

They had a quick shower together before getting dressed and going downstairs to the kitchen, where they found Paul sitting at the table with the jug of coffee, and Steph at the stove, frying the bacon.

'Morning you two,' Paul said with a grin. 'How're your heads?'

'Fine, thanks,' Rory replied.

'Did you sleep all right?' Steph asked as she started to serve the breakfast.

'Lovely thanks,' Amy said. 'Although, I think your central heating boiler needs servicing. It's making a humming noise.'

Paul frowned. 'But the central heating isn't on.'

'So what was it? I mean, it didn't bother us at all, it was just like a diesel engine ticking over,' Amy explained.

'Oh, I know what that is,' Steph told them, having been brought up in the city. 'You've heard the Bristol Hum.'


	2. The Bristol Hum

**Chapter 2**

 **The Bristol hum**

 **Lungbarrow Tree House.**

 **Tardis Bay.**

 **The Isle of Gallifrey.**

 **Beta Pegasi II. (Also known as Paradise)**

 **196 light years from Earth.**

Rose Smith was lying on her sun lounger in front of their Tree House, wearing her usual white, chamois leather mini dress which her husband John said made her look like Jane from the Tarzan films. John was at the barbecue, in his usual attire of animal skin loin cloth and a sleeveless animal skin jacket. On sun loungers beside Rose were her parents, Jackie and Pete Tyler, who were celebrating their wedding anniversary.

The Tree House itself had evolved and expanded over time, due to the TARDIS coral that John had implanted into the original construction. The support struts now resembled the coral struts that used to be in the original TARDIS, and with the round doors and windows, Rose was reminded of Bilbo Baggins' house from Lord of the Rings. The whole structure had a living, organic feel to it, similar to the chapter houses on Gallifrey.

Jackie sighed contentedly as she enjoyed the afternoon sunshine in her one piece swimming costume and wrap around skirt. Pete was wearing bermuda shorts, a loud Hawaiian shirt, and a Stetson.

Children's laughter carried on the warm breeze from the beach in front of them as they played a game of volleyball. Eyeulf and his young brother Jason were one side of the net, with their sister Juleshka, and their uncle, Tony Tyler on the other.

Rose looked over at her parents and smiled. 'Happy anniversary,' she said.

'Thank you Sweetheart. This is perfect,' Jackie replied.

'Yeah, you're right. This place is perfect. Thanks for inviting us,' Pete added

'Oh you, mum and Tony are always welcome here.'

Pete looked over to the rustic barbecue under the tree house. 'Need any help over there?' he called to John.

'Nah. I'm fine. The coals are hot, my beers cold, the sausages are sizzling, and the burgers are. John frowned in thought. 'I need a word beginning with "B".'

'Burnt?' Rose offered with her teasing smile.

'Burnt?!' John said indignantly. 'I'll have you know they're char grilled to perfection.'

'Don't begin with a "B" though, does it?' Rose replied cheekily. John grinned at her and raised his bottle of beer in salute.

Pete saw the salute and reached into the ice box by his side. 'Another beer?' He picked up his own bottle out of the sand, stood up and ambled over to John. 'There you go Son. Tell you what. While I'm here, why don't I cut the bread rolls?'

'Hah! Top man,' John said, and they clinked their bottles together. 'HEY KIDS,' he called over to the volleyball contestants. 'Grubs nearly ready. Come and wash your hands.'

'YAY!' came the enthusiastic reply as they ran up the beach.

At one of the support corals, there was a standpipe with a tap where they could wash their hands. The water came from a stream, which had a flexible pipe in it. That pipe had all sorts of nano filters built in to it so that when the water reached the house plumbing system, it was clean, pure water.

Everyone sat at the picnic benches, and with Pete's help, John started to hand out the hot dogs and burgers. There was a gentle hum of conversation and occasional laughter as they helped themselves to fried onions, ketchup and mustard which were on the table.

'Ooh. Look Dad. A shooting star,' Juleshka said, pointing up to the evening sky.

John turned to look up at the sky behind him, and saw a fireball leaving a trail of fire behind it. It was breaking up into several, smaller fireballs. 'Hmm. I don't think that's a meteor, it's too slow. I think it might be a ship breaking up in the upper atmosphere.'

'Oh dear. I hope there wasn't anyone on board,' Rose said with concern.

John had a swig of his beer and finished his burger as he stood up. 'I'll just nip into the TARDIS and check the scanner. There might have been an escape pod or flight recorder.'

Rose finished her hot dog and had a sip of her white wine. 'Carry on with the barbecue. We'll be back in a minute.'

At the console monitor, John checked for an emergency beacon. 'Ah, here we are. A research vessel from the Jaggit Brocade. They're affiliated to the Scarlet Junction you know. This one's registered to Convex Twenty Two.'

'Jaggit Brocade?' Rose asked with a frown. She'd heard that before, but couldn't remember when. 'I'm sure I've heard that before. Are they harmless or hostile?'

John smiled. 'Just a bunch of curious explorers. Shall we go and see if they're all right?'

'Where are they?'

'Their pod came down on the night side of the planet, in the middle of the primordial jungle.'

'We can't leave them there, can we?' Rose said.

'Certainly not. I think we can offer them some more comfortable surroundings while they wait for rescue.' He started the Time Rotor and locked on to the emergency beacon.

Rose pulled on her lace up, knee high, white chamois leather boots, and started to tighten the laces. John pulled on his knee high leather boots and did the same. The far side of the planet was an unexplored wilderness, and there were all sorts of creatures lurking in the undergrowth, waiting to bite, sting or envenomate their legs.

The TARDIS had landed in a small clearing surrounded by weird alien trees and plants, some of which were bioluminescent. There were a number of worn tracks into the jungle, presumably made by the various life forms that lived their. They carefully followed one of the tracks to the site where the escape pod had landed. As they looked up into the forest canopy, they could see a neat "tunnel" where the pod had crashed through.

The escape pod was tear-drop shaped, and had a mirror perfect hull. There was a tear-drop shaped hole in the side where the hatch had opened and lowered down. There were five occupants in pressure suits and helmets packed inside, and a woman in a pressure suit, with a ring around her neck where a helmet could attach, trying to disentangle the undergrowth from around the hatch.

When she spotted John and Rose they saw her body tense up. 'Oh. Hello . . . Don't-be-afraid,' she said slowly. 'We-are-travellers-from . . . a-long-way-away. This-is-our-ship, sort-of.' She was using her hands to gesticulate the meaning of her words.

John and Rose frowned at each other and then realised that their clothing made them look like primitive natives. They grinned at each other and turned back to the woman.

'Yes. We-know,' John said, gesticulating as the woman had.

Rose snorted a laugh and playfully slapped his arm. 'Behave,' she told him. 'Hi. I'm Rose. This is John. We saw your ship break up in the upper atmosphere and thought you might need some help. Is anyone injured?'

It was the woman's turn to frown. 'Er, no. The pod has inertial stasis dampers. It was just like a roller-coaster ride . . . Oh, sorry. I'm Raffaela.'

John gave her his best smile. 'Nice to meet you Raffaela. Would you like to come to our barbecue?'

* * *

 **Torchwood Special Operations Standby Room.**

 **Torchwood Tower, Canary Wharf.**

 **08:20.**

'What? And they crashed into your tree house?' Julia asked Rose after the briefing.

Rose laughed. 'No. They crashed on the far side of the planet. We went to help and brought them back to the barbecue while they waited for their rescue ship.'

'That must have been one of the most comfortable waits for rescue they'd ever had,' Julia said with a laugh.

'Well, they'd never crashed before. But I'm guessing they won't get that kind of service in the future. Oh, and when the rescue team arrived, it turned into one big party. It was brilliant. And we exchanged contact details so we can keep in touch.'

Rose spotted Amy in the kitchen area pouring a cup of tea and went over. 'How was your weekend Amy? It was Bristol you went to wasn't it?'

'Yeah. It was great. We met up with our old friends there. Oh, and I heard the Bristol Hum.'

'The Bristol Hum? What's the Bristol Hum?' Rose asked.

'It's a hum . . . in Bristol,' Amy told her. 'But apparently, it's not only in Bristol. I looked it up on the internet. Taos, Kokomo, and West Seattle in the States. Aukland and Wellington in New Zealand. It's a global phenomenon.'

'And what's causin' it?' Rose asked.

'That's the interestin' bit, because there are loads of theories, but nobody really knows.'

'And is it dangerous? Y'know, somethin' that Torchwood should be investigatin'?'

Amy shrugged. 'Dunno. Apparently a couple of people have committed suicide because the noise was driving them mad. I tried to record it on my phone. Do you want to hear?'

'Yeah. Let's have a listen.'

Amy took her phone out of the breast pocket of her uniform and selected the media player app.

['Hush up a minute you lot, I'm gonna try and record it,'] Rose heard from the phone speaker. She could hear the volume being increased on the microphone, and then she heard it.

[Hum-um-um-um-um-um-um-um-um.] ['ARE YOU GETTING IT?'] Steph's amplified voice asked, which made them jump.

['SHUSH . . . I THINK SO.']

[Hum-um-um-um-um-um-um-um-um.]

'And it wasn't anythin' in the flat?' Rose enquired.

'No. I went into Torchwood mode and investigated everythin' I could without my scanner. It wasn't a car out in the street. Paul and Steph live on a new development at Shirehampton on the outskirts of Bristol. There are no factories nearby, no offices with air conditioning units on roofs, nothin'. Oh, there is the M5 motorway nearby, but you can hear that the distant traffic is a totally different noise to the hum.'

Rose gave her a proud smile. 'Well done Agent Williams.'

Amy had a proud smile of her own. Praise from Rose Smith, her supervisor was praise indeed. 'Thank you.'

'While it's quiet, why don'tcha get that recordin' up to Multimedia and see if they can do anythin' with it. I'll get John to have a listen to it when he comes in.'

Amy was bouncing on her toes with excitement. She'd discovered a mystery and was being allowed to investigate it. 'Okay. I'm on my way.'

Rose had a fond smile on her lips as she remembered her days as a rookie. All enthusiasm and energy, although that was mainly to distract her from the sadness of being separated from the Doctor, and thinking that she would never see him again.

'So why am I listening to a diesel engine ticking over?' John asked Rose and Amy in the Multimedia lab, a couple of hours later.

'You're not,' Rose told him.

'Are you sure? It sounds like a diesel engine.'

'I'm sure,' Amy replied. 'I checked.'

'So, what is it then?'

'The Bristol Hum.'

'The Bristol Hum? What's the Bristol Hum then?'

Amy and Rose looked at each other and grinned before looking at him. 'It's a hum . . . in Bristol.'

'Ah. Does what it says on the tin then. What's causing it?'

'Nobody knows for sure,' Amy told him. 'I've done some research, and there are loads of theories.'

John raised his eyebrows and gave Rose an impressed look. His protégé was showing him that he'd been right to recommend her for selection. He took his brainy specs out of his pocket and put them on. 'Go on then, show me what you've found out about the Bristol Hummm.'

'Really? Er, okay.' She took out her tablet PC, brought up her research, and started reading. 'The essential element that defines the Hum is what is perceived as a persistent low-frequency sound, often described as being comparable to that of a distant diesel engine idling.'

'Told you,' John announced, and Rose gently slapped his shoulder for him to shut up and stop interrupting.

'. . . Or to some similar low-pitched sound for which obvious sources, for example, household appliances, traffic noise, and the like have been ruled out. Some people hear the Hum only, or much more, indoors as compared with outdoors. Some perceive vibrations that can be felt through the body. Earplugs are reported as not decreasing it. For those who can hear the Hum, it can be a very disturbing phenomenon and it has been linked to at least three suicides in the UK.'

'So not everyone can hear it then?' John asked, glancing at his wife to see if another shoulder slap was on the cards. It seemed that Rose thought this was a reasonable question.

'No. There are some theories on that. Apparently human ears generate their own noises, called . . .' She referred to her notes. 'Spontaneous oto . . . acoustic emissions. A number of studies have shown that approximately half of adults with normal hearing have them, although the majority are unaware of these sounds. The people who do hear these sounds typically hear a faint buzzing or ringing, especially if they are otherwise in complete silence.'

'Hmmm,' John said as he read about it on a screen. 'And it's not just Bristol then, it's all over the world.'

'Yeah, although Bristol was one of the first. Reports started trickling in during the 1950s from people who had never heard anything unusual before; suddenly, they were pestered by an annoying, low-frequency humming, throbbing or rumbling sound.'

'Right. So that brings the latest theory about deep ocean currents vibrating the sea floor into question,' John reasoned. 'Those currents have been running for millions of years. If this started suddenly in the fifties, then it's going to be artificial.'

Amy continued her narrative. 'The cases seem to have several factors in common: Generally, the Hum is only heard indoors, and it's louder at night than during the day, which was true at Paul and Steph's.'

'Paul and Steph?' John asked with a look of confusion.

'Our friends in Bristol. Rory and me spent the weekend there. It's where I recorded the sound. Apparently, the Hum is more common in rural or suburban environments; reports of a hum are rare in urban areas, probably because of the steady background noise in crowded cities.'

'Yeah,' John agreed with a frown. 'Although . . . it says here only about two percent of the people living in any given Hum-prone area can hear the sound, and most of them are ages fifty five to seventy, that's according to a 2003 study by acoustical consultant Geoff Leventhall of Surrey, England. Don't you find that strange?'

'What? What have you spotted?' Rose asked.

John scratched the back of his head. 'Wellll. Young people tend to have more acute hearing than the elderly. And I'd say Amy here was young.'

'Thank you,' Amy said. 'I like to think so too.'

'So what is it about this noise that makes it selective?'

'I dunno. Most of the "hearers" or "hummers" as they are called describe the sound as similar to a diesel engine idling nearby,' Amy continued. 'It says here that the Hum has driven virtually every one of them to the point of despair. And being dismissed as crackpots or whiners only exacerbates the distress for these complainants, most of whom have perfectly normal hearing. Sufferers complain of headaches, nausea, dizziness, nosebleeds and sleep disturbances. The BBC reported that at least one suicide in the United Kingdom has been blamed on the Hum.'

John laughed as he read a report off the internet. 'Most researchers investigating the Hum express some confidence that the phenomenon is real, and not the result of mass hysteria or hearers' hypochondria or extraterrestrials beaming signals to Earth from their spaceships.'

'We'd have spotted that for sure,' Rose said with a grin.

'And so it goes on,' John said. 'Lots of theories, lots of research, and no definitive answers. I do love a good mystery. Well done Amy. That's a good start. So from your initial enquiry, what are your recommendations?'

Amy froze like a rabbit caught in headlights. This was the cleverest and most renowned scientist on the planet, asking her for recommendations. 'Er . . . I don't know.'

John smiled kindly. 'What questions have you got that you think need answering?'

She relaxed a little as she realised he was helping her. She wasn't the cleverest scientist on the planet, so it wouldn't be anything technical. It would be obvious things that the man in the street would want to know. 'Okay. Nineteen fifties. What things happened in the fifties that could have started the phenomenon?'

John gave her his widest grin, which meant she was on to something. 'Only two percent of the population can hear it. What do that two percent have in common?'

John now had an open mouthed smile. He looked at Rose and winked. '. . . Or, is the phenomenon somehow choosing those two percent?'

'Oh, bravo! Those were just the questions I was asking myself. And, do you know what that means?'

'No,' Amy said hesitantly.

'It means we're going to Bristol to get a listen to the Hum first hand, with some of the best equipment on the planet.'


	3. Decoding the hum

**Authors note: (I have posted a Rose and Ten video on YouTube called the Doctor and Rose. The Rain after Doomsday. Check it out if you are interested.)**

 **Chapter 3**

 **Decoding the hum**

 **M4 Motorway.**

 **Westbound Carriageway.**

'So we're going all the way to Bristol to record a hum?' "Other Craig" Owens asked his field partner in the back of the Range Rover. 'Here . . . Hmmmmmm,' he hummed into his tablet PC. 'There you go. Don't need to go to Bristol for that.'

Amy rolled her eyes. 'We're not going just to record it, we're going to investigate it. Haven't you read your mission briefing?'

'What mission briefing? You just told me we were off to Bristol and I should grab my gear,' Craig complained.

'Of all the agents in Blue Watch, I had to get lumbered with you,' Amy said with a lopsided smile.

Camera Director David Rea chuckled to himself as he filmed the interaction from the front passenger seat. The viewers had really taken to these two new recruits, and loved their sniping banter.

'It could be worse,' Craig started to say and then paused for thought. Amy crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to tell her who he thought could be worse. 'No, actually . . . I think you've hit rock bottom with me.'

'Wellll. I suppose it's good to have a field partner who knows his limitations. So, what have you found out about the nineteen fifties?'

'Ooh. Elvis. Mods and Rockers,' John said enthusiastically from the driver's seat. 'And chicks in pink tulle dresses on the back of scooters.'

'Er, yeah. There was all that,' Craig said. 'But from a technological viewpoint, CERN was established in Switzerland. The Russians opened the first nuclear power plant. The first transistorised computer was built in Manchester, and of course, Sputnik was launched into space.'

'Ah yes, I remember them well,' John said with a wistful smile. 'All good possible sources for phenomena that hadn't been seen before the fifties.'

'So what have you found out?' Craig asked Amy.

'Okay. So two percent of the world's population have green eyes. Could that be it?'

Craig stared at her face. 'Not unless you're wearing coloured contact lenses. Your eyes are brown.'

'Oh yeah. You're right. Ooh, here we are though. Less than two percent have two copies of a recessive allele on chromosome 16 which produces an altered version of the MC1R protein which produces red hair . . . And before you say anythin', I'm not wearin' a wig.'

'Never crossed my mind,' Craig said with a smile.

'Always wanted to be ginger,' John said distractedly, out of the blue. 'Never quite made it though.'

Craig and Amy gave each other knowing looks. They really liked Doctor Smith. He was your typical example of an eccentric scientist, thoughts all over the place and saying random things.

'I prefer the term redhead myself,' Amy told them. 'Although I also like it when Rory calls me "flame haired".'

'When's that then?' Craig asked with a cheeky smile.

'Never you mind,' Amy told him, and went back to her research. 'This one's a bit disturbin'. Psychopaths and Sociopaths make up two percent of the population. I hope that's not the one we're lookin' for.'

'Two percent of the people think, three percent of the people think they think, and ninety-five percent of the people would rather die than think,' John said.

'Eh?' Amy and Craig said together.

'George Bernard Shaw. Not much use in finding the hum, I grant you. But I quite like that quote.'

'O-kay,' Craig said uncertainly. 'So I get that stuff in the fifties could have started the hum, and I get that somehow only two percent of people can hear it. But why are we having to go to Bristol to hear it? Why isn't it everywhere?'

John turned in his seat to look at them. The car was driving itself. 'Ooh, look out Amy. You've got competition. My guess would be something like harmonic antinodes, where the amplitude of a waveform rises from zero, curves to its peak, and then falls back to zero.'

'And Bristol is on a peak?' Amy queried.

'Sorry Craig, she's back in the lead,' John said with a grin.

'So what's the plan when we get there?' Craig asked.

'We scan the area for the hum. See if we can identify a cause for it, and try to locate the origin,' John told them.

'Simple huh?' Craig said.

About an hour later, the car drove itself along The Portway on the outskirts of Bristol, and turned onto the new housing development where Amy's friends lived. John was reminded of Dame Kelly Holmes Close in the old universe where he and Rose had helped an Isolus find its way home.

They climbed out of the Range Rover, and John licked his finger before sticking it in the air for no apparent reason. He looked around and sniffed the air. 'Can you hear it? That "thrumming" sound?'

Amy nodded. 'Yeah. That's it.'

Craig frowned and held his head on one side. 'Nah, I'm not gettin' it.'

John gave him an intense stare. 'Nothing? At all?'

Craig shrugged his shoulders and tilted his head to the side as he listened. 'Traffic from that main road . . .'

'The Portway,' Amy informed him.

'Yeah, that's the one. Birds singin'. A dog barkin'.'

'And a hum humming,' John said as he took out his sonic screwdriver and walked over to Craig. He scanned his head and frowned at the readings. He then pulled on Craig's earlobe and looked inside. 'Nothing in there.'

Amy spurted a laugh. 'That's what I've been saying.'

'So why can't I hear it?' Craig asked him.

'Well. For a start, you're not a red haired, green eyed psychopath.' He gave Amy a cheeky smile. 'I think the signal has a perception discriminator encoded in it. Only people with a specific synaptic engram programmed into their genes can hear it without listening for it.'

'Eh?' Craig said.

'You hear millions of different sounds every day,' John explained. 'You only listen to a few of them when your brain brings them to your attention.'

John put his hand on Craig's shoulder. 'Take a deep breath, and relax your shoulders.'

Craig drew in a deep breath and worked his neck around. 'Good lad. Now go "ommmm".' John instructed.

'Ommmm,' Craig intoned.

'Now close your eyes and listen . . .'

Craig closed his eyes and listened.

"Hum-um-um-um-um-um-um-um-um" he heard, apparently from all around him. 'What is that? It seems to be coming from everywhere.'

'That, you numpty, is what we've come to find out,' Amy told him with a lopsided smile.

They took out their scanners and started moving away from the car. John walked to the middle of the road, got down on his hands and knees, and listened to the tarmac. He then stood up and looked up and down the street. He walked over to a manhole cover and took his sonic screwdriver out of the inside pocket of his brown, pinstriped suit. He crouched down and scanned the metal cover, before inspecting the results on the holographic display.

'Fifty six Hertz modulated waveform at about six to eight decibels,' Amy reported from her scanner.

'No wonder it's easier to hear at night,' Craig said. 'That's barely above the sound of a gentle breeze. Can't seem to get a fix on it though.'

John had gone back to the car, and reached what looked like a loud hailer out of the back of it. 'That, is why I brought this.'

'Wha? A loud hailer?' Amy asked with a frown.

John smiled. 'It's not for hailing loudly,' he said, and then leaned forward in a conspiratorial fashion. 'It's for listening very, very quietly,' he whispered.

He straightened up and gave them an open mouthed smile. 'Isn't that brilliant!'

On the back of the "listening very, very quietly" device, was a LCD screen and a numeric keypad. 'Right. We just key in fifty six, set it to "listen", and then wave it about until it picks up the strongest signal.'

He started walking around the street, holding the device at arm's length. After a few minutes, he stopped and frowned at the device. He scratched the back of his head and thumped the side of the display. 'That can't be right.'

'What is it Doc?' Craig asked as he saved the data on his scanner.

'This thing doesn't seem to be working right.'

'Why? What's wrong with it?' Amy asked.

'Well. It's a directional microphone, and when you point it in the direction of the source of a sound, the amplitude shows maximum. But no matter where I point it, the reading is always the same, and that's not possible.'

'What? So the sound is coming from everywhere?' Amy asked.

'Can't be. Like I said, this thing must be faulty . . . Have you finished your scans?'

'Yeah. The data is saved and uploaded to Torchwood,' Craig informed him.

'Good, then I think we should get back and analyse that data. Something's not right here.'

* * *

In the Multimedia Lab, John was processing the data that had been uploaded from the scanners. Rose came up behind him, wrapped her arms around his shoulders, and kissed his cheek.

'Whatcha found then?' she asked him.

'Well. There's a lot going on with this data. The fifty six Hertz is just a central carrier frequency. There are a number of side-band frequencies in there as well.'

'Meanin'?' Rose asked with a raised eyebrow.

'Meaning that this hum is a frequency modulated, perception discriminated signal. Rose, there's a message in this hum . . . a message for two percent of the population.'

'A message?! Oh my God. What message? What's it say?' she asked as she sat beside him and looked at the digitised waveform on the screen.

'That's what I'm trying to decode at the moment. The signal's being distorted somehow. It's like it's phase shifted somehow.'

'What? Like when the Crucible was out of phase with the rest of the universe in the Medusa Cascade y'mean?'

He gave her a grin. 'Same principle yeah, but a different kind of shift. If I can find out how it's been shifted, I can correct for it and remodulate the message.'

She gave him her tongue between the teeth grin. 'I love it when ya talk technical. So how many ways can you phase shift a signal?'

He gave her a quick peck on the lips. 'And I love it when you talk technical. It gets me thinking on the right track. So, we have a message that appears to come from everywhere at once. We know that's not possible in this universe, don't we?'

'Er, yeah. But when we're in the TARDIS, in the Vortex, then we are everywhere and everywhen at once . . . aren't we?' she said tentatively, trying to remember what he had told her about the nature of the Vortex.

'The Vortex . . . of course!' He stood up, grabbed her shoulders, and snogged her. He then put his mouth in gear and started talking excitedly. 'So this message is from somewhere else and is mapping itself onto this universe so that it appears to be everywhere at once. If we take the TARDIS into the Vortex, we can extrapolate the origin of the signal and compensate for the distortion.'

She took his offered hand and grinned. 'Come on then, what are y'waitin' for?'

They went down to the Standby Room, and Rose went to Andy McNab's office where she found Duncan Prescott filing reports.

'Dunc. John's found a hidden message and we need to take a quick trip in the TARDIS. Are you okay to take over the Watch for a while?'

Duncan smiled at her. He knew if the Doc was onto something, he wouldn't give a thought to protocol. He'd just up sticks and go, taking the watch supervisor with him. 'Yeah. Go for it. I'm nearly done with these reports anyway.'

'Thanks Dunc. You're the best.'

John took his smart phone out of his pocket and selected the TARDIS app. A few seconds later, the Standby Room was filled with the trumpeting brouhaha of the TARDIS shouldering its way onto the landing pad. He unlocked the door and pushed it open for Rose to enter, before following her inside. At the console, he put the TARDIS into the Vortex and went to the monitor to start analysing the signal.

'Right then, let's start pulling this apart and putting it back together.'

Rose listened to the audio output, which sounded like radio static and a station not quite tuned in.

['. . . Use . . .'] came out of the speaker, distorted and phase altered.

'Did you hear that?' Rose asked excitedly. 'Was that someone sayin' "use"?'

John grinned and nodded. 'Yeah, I do believe it was.'

'Use what? Are they tryin' to tell us to use somethin' to hear the message?'

'I doubt it. You'd need to be able to hear the message in the first place to hear what they wanted you to use.'

'Oh yeah.'

['Slash apple . . . ctor offset . . .'] the voice said with less distortion.

'That was clearer that time,' Rose told him.

'This is weird,' John said with a frown. 'The message seems to originate outside of our universe.'

'Outside? What, like from the Void? It's not the Daleks or the Cybermen is it?' Rose asked, but he was too busy fiddling with the console to answer.

'Nah . . . Oh!' he said suddenly and straightened up from the console, crossing his arms. 'Oh that is just too weird.'

'What is? What?'

'It's coming from a parallel universe.'

Rose looked puzzled. 'But parallel universes are closed off.'

'They are now, yeah. But at some point, when they were open, this message snook through to the nineteen fifties and got stuck in a time loop,' John explained.

'So what does it say?'

'Well. Now I know what's causing the distortion, I can do this.' He twiddled and twisted knobs and dials, and pulled down a lever.

['I could use a lift sweetie. Eight seven three five, slash three four nine by ten, zero twelve slash apple, vector offset nine zero epsilon,'] a woman's voice said from the speaker. ['I could use a lift sweetie. Eight seven three five, slash three four nine by ten, zero twelve slash apple, vector offset nine zero epsilon,'] it repeated on a loop.

'Those were coordinates,' Rose realised. 'And who the hell is that anyway?'


	4. Alternate Reality

**Chapter 4**

 **Alternate Reality**

"Those were coordinates" Rose had realised as John decoded the message in the hum, and then had asked him, who the hell it was who knew TARDIS coordinates.

'Ah. That's a bit complicated,' he said, tugging his ear.

'Complicated? Do you know her?' Rose asked, wondering if a Time Lord, or was it Lady, had survived the Time War in an alternate universe.

'Welll. When I say complicated. It's more sort of . . . awkward.'

'Awkward? Awkward how? Who is she?' Rose was becoming suspicious of his evasiveness.

John could feel her suspicion. 'Oh all right. Do you remember me telling you about Donna and the Vashta Nerada in The Library that time.'

'Yeah, they swarmed an ate the expedition didn't they?' Rose remembered. After they were reunited in this universe, they had told each other all about their individual adventures.

'That's right. And do you remember me telling you about the mission leader, River Song?'

'Is that her? River Song?'

'Yeah. And there's something else Rose. She knew me . . . future me. Me in the other universe. And . . . she knew my name,' he confessed.

'Wha'? But if she knew your name, then that means . . .'

'That she and future me get married, yeah.'

'And you didn't think to tell me that? Did you think I'd be upset or jealous or somethin'?' Rose realised.

'To be honest, I wasn't sure how you'd react. Don't forget, I'm still new to all this human emotion stuff. I remember how you reacted to Sarah Jane and Reinette.'

'Oh yeah . . . sorry about that Love. I was a bit immature back then,' she admitted, and then stroked his cheek. 'But that day on the beach when "other you" left us here, that must have been one of the most difficult things to do. Why shouldn't "other you" find someone else? He must have got some comfort from knowing that we would be together.'

He held her around the waist and kissed her on the lips. 'You are amazing Love. It's just that when I met her, she was very . . . forthright and in control.'

'Bossy y'mean,' Rose said with a smirk.

'Yeah. Bossy,' he agreed with a laugh.

'Well. It sounds like miss bossy boots needs a ride. Shall we go and offer her a lift?'

'If you're all right with that,' he said.

'Are you kiddin'? I can't wait to meet the woman who's good enough for future "other you" . . . Allons-Y.'

They turned back to the console where John interlinked his fingers and flexed them outwards. 'Right then, let's see . . . Eight seven three five,' he said, twiddling something that looked like a one eyed owl, before moving to another section. 'Slash three four nine by ten.' He twisted a green, glass ball with bubbles in it. 'Zero twelve slash apple.' He gave a knobbled wheel a couple of spins, and his eyes went wide at the readout on the screen.

'What?' Rose asked, seeing the expression on his face, and feeling his apprehension. 'What's wrong?'

'Those coordinates . . .' He left the sentence unfinished.

'What about 'em? Where are they?'

'London. The spatial coordinates are for London. Lambeth Palace Road to be precise. Y'know, by Lambeth Pier.'

Rose did know. How could she forget the first time they'd come to Pete's World.

'But it's the temporal coordinates which are the most interesting,' John said, bringing her out of her memories.

The full realisation of what he was saying hit her. 'Oh, don't tell me it's the first of February, two thousand and seven?'

'Yep. It looks like River Song was responsible for us falling out of our universe in the first place.'

'Not just that, she's responsible for changin' the course of my life . . . For your life, sort of.'

'Yeah, I suppose she is. So, do you want to go and thank her?'

'Oh yeah!' she said enthusiastically. 'So, is that vector offset nine zero epsilon gonna put us in the alternate reality?'

He gave her another of his open mouthed proud smiles. 'There's no getting anything past you these days, is there?'

'It must be all these years of workin' for Torchwood. Bound to pick this stuff up,' she said with her teasing smile. And she was right . . . sort of; because what Rose didn't realise was, that since she had married the Metacrisis Doctor and formed a telepathic link with him, she had been learning things through a form of psychic osmosis.

John moved around the console and tapped some numbers into a keypad. 'Vector offset nine zero epsilon. That's it. The signal will pull us into the correct universe . . . Ready?'

Rose gave him her excited smile and powered up the atom accelerator. John released the time rotor handbrake and activated the inertial dampers. She then engaged the harmonic generator, as John released the locking down mechanism before pulling up the engine release lever with his usual flourish and big grin. Finally, Rose activated the materialise/dematerialise function, and gradually increased the space-time throttle, which started the Time Rotor grinding up and down.

They moved around the console, fine tuning the settings as they travelled through the Vortex. Rose stole a quick kiss as John moved past her. The TARDIS bucked and juddered as it passed from one universe to another. The lights flickered as the TARDIS engaged an energy buffer so that it could still function in the alternate universe.

'Right. I'd better change out of this uniform and put somethin' more practical on,' Rose said, heading out of the console room.

A few minutes later, Rose reappeared, dressed in jeans, T-shirt and hoodie. 'So, if this River Song has come from the old universe,' Rose thought out loud. 'And we're comin' from Dad's World's universe . . .'

'Hmmm?' John responded.

'Then the question is . . . where the hell are we goin'?'

'Absolutely no idea,' he said with an open mouthed grin. 'Isn't that brilliant!?'

'Yeah, great,' Rose said with a hint of reservation. 'So we're just goin' to land, pick up River, and then leave, yeah? We're not goin' lookin' for trouble are we? 'Cos Mum and Dad are expecting us back to pick up the kids.' She thought it was prudent to remind him of his responsibilities.

'Of course. TARDIS Taxis. Anywhere, anywhen. Reasonable rates. No time too short, no distance too far,' he joked as he landed the TARDIS with a "clump".

He held out his hand, wiggling his fingers and waggling his eyebrows. Rose felt that thrill which she always felt when they went somewhere new. She took his hand and they hurried down the ramp to the doors.

'Oh God. This is SO weird. Just think, at this moment in "Dad's world", the original you, me, and Mickey are steppin' out of the TARDIS.'

John looked around the Embankment, where boats were moored at Lambeth Pier on the Thames. 'Yeah,' he said distractedly as he jumped down from the grassy bank onto the pavement, his hands in his pockets. He turned to look past the TARDIS to Lambeth Palace Road. He looked up at the blue, February sky. 'We had Zeppelins though. No Zeppelins here,' he observed.

Rose looked up too. 'Oh yeah.' She made her way across the paved area towards the river wall, and an advertising display which she remembered from before.

John was frowning as he looked south towards Lambeth Bridge, where the tall stone pillars marked its position. He then looked to the north and squinted into the distance at Westminster Bridge. Something wasn't right.

'I wonder if they have a Pete Tyler in this world?' Rose asked with a melancholy air as she looked at an advert for a building society. When they had first arrived in "Pete's World", the advert had been for cherry flavoured Vitex Lite.

'Hmm?' John replied, joining her at the display.

'I was wonderin' if there was a Tyler family in this universe?'

'I'll tell you what there isn't,' he said, looking back at Lambeth Palace Road. 'There isn't any traffic.'

Rose looked up and down the road. There were pedestrian tourists walking up and down the road, and people jogging along the side of the river. But there was no road traffic. No cars, no delivery vans, no black taxis, and no iconic red buses.

'Maybe it's a Sunday,' Rose suggested.

'Nah. First of February, two thousand and seven is a Thursday. Well, unless they're using the Julian calendar instead of the Gregorian . . . Or, maybe they have their own calendar.'

'Maybe London is traffic free, y'know to get rid of congestion.'

John wasn't convinced. 'You'd still need deliveries to the shops and stores though.'

'Oh yeah. Well, it's one of those things that makes this universe different,' Rose said. 'And we ain't stayin', so I guess we'll never know. So, any idea where this River Song is?'

'Eh? Oh, hold on.' John reached inside his jacket, took out his sonic screwdriver and started scanning.

'What'cha scannin' for?' Rose asked him.

'Void stuff. I'm not sure how she got here, but she must have come via-the-void,' he said with a flourish.

Whilst they had been standing there, several tourists had stopped and were whispering to each other. A teenage girl approached hesitantly.

'Excuse me. I don't mean to intrude, but are you Rose Tyler?' she asked.

Rose frowned in confusion. 'Er, sort of. Yeah.'

The girl grinned with excitement. 'I knew it! I told them it was you.' She looked over to the group and nodded. 'Could I be cheeky and ask for your autograph?'

'My autograph?' Rose looked at John, who just shrugged his shoulders. 'You want my autograph?'

The girl's face fell in disappointment. 'Oh, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked. I didn't mean to offend you.'

'No, no. You haven't offended me. I was just surprised that you knew who I am and that you would want my autograph,' Rose said, rubbing the girl's arm.'

'You're kiddin' me,' the girl said. 'Silver medallist in the two thousand and four Olympics and TV celebrity. Of course I'd want your autograph.'

'Silver medallist?' Rose asked.

'TV celebrity?' John echoed.

'Er, yeah. Okay.' Rose said. 'Have you got somethin' for me to autograph?'

The girl produced a TV chat magazine from her jacket pocket, along with a fibre tipped pen. Rose signed her maiden name on the front cover.

'Thank you. That's brilliant . . . Oh, and sorry to hear about the divorce,' the girl said, before hurrying back to her friends.

'What the hell was all that about?' John asked.

'I have no idea,' Rose replied. 'But I suspect that the Rose Tyler in this universe is a bit of a celebrity . . . Silver medal in Athens,' she said with pride.

John resumed his scanning, and a source of "void stuff" suddenly appeared by the low Embankment wall behind them.

'You took your time.' A woman said.

'River Song,' John said, looking straight ahead. He turned around to see a curly haired blonde in an elegant, designer dress, leaning against the Embankment wall. 'Where did you suddenly appear from?'

'Hello Sweetie. Oh but look at you. You're so young,' River said. She didn't know that John wasn't the original Doctor, and she hadn't seen this incarnation before. The final encounter in The Library wouldn't be for another few years for her.

'Younger than you can imagine,' John said to himself.

'And your companion. Who are you travelling with at the moment?' River asked.

'Companion?' Rose asked in an annoyed tone. 'I'm his wife! The name's Rose. Rose Smi. . .'

'Rose?! Rose Tyler? Oh this IS early days for you,' River said excitedly, and then frowned. 'Did you say you were married? But that's not right. You don't get married.'

'Ah. Right,' John said, scratching the back of his neck. 'I'm not who you think I am.'

'What do you mean "you're not who I think you are"? You're the Doctor.' River reached into her designer bag and took out a wallet which she flipped through. 'There you are in your tenth body . . . Well, ten-ish. There's still a debate about what happened on Karn in your eighth body. But it's the same tight suit, foxy looks and great hair.'

John sniffed and worked his neck around. 'Yep. That's me,' he said in a high voice. 'But I'm not him.'

'Can I have a look at that?' Rose asked, holding her hand out for the wallet.

'Oh, sorry dear. Spoilers.' She put the wallet away, and took out a battered blue book which looked like the doors of the TARDIS. 'Shall we sync our diaries?'

'Oh no, no, no, no, no. I told you, I'm not who you think I am. We are SO not doing diaries,' John told her.

'Really? Are you sure?' River asked with a frown. 'Crash of the Byzantium? Picnic at Asgard?'

'Stop it! Look, let's get in the TARDIS and I'll explain as we take you home.'

'Well, we could do that yes,' River said as she walked towards them, putting her diary in her bag and taking out her tablet device. 'Or, you could help me break someone out of a high security cell.'

'Oh no, no, no,' Rose said quickly. 'We came here to give you a lift. That's all.'

River held the tablet up and showed them a picture of a blue, wooden, police call box. In front of the wooden box was a man with dark, curly, shoulder length hair, wearing an open necked white shirt, scarf, brown trousers and a three quarter length coat. At his side was an elfish looking blonde girl in a cheque shirt, denim shorts and hiking boots.

'Lucie!' John whispered.

'John. Is that this world's version of the Doctor?' Rose asked quietly.

'Yeah. Eighth body. And the girl is Lucie Miller,' he replied sadly. It had been over a hundred years since he had seen that impish smile. He remembered how she had flown a Dalek Saucer under a Dalek stronghold and detonated a bomb to stop an invasion, creating a time warp that sucked the Daleks in.

'So this universe has Time Lords then,' Rose said, realising that he was no longer alone.

'Yes. And these two have been snatched by Torchwood,' River informed them. 'They're being held at . . .'

'Canary Wharf,' John finished for her. 'You'd better tell me what you know.'

'Of course. Here, hold on to these,' River said, holding out two high tech key fobs.

Rose turned it over in her hands to inspect the device. 'What's . . .'

The trio disappeared from the pedestrian area in front of Lambeth Pier.


	5. River's World

**Chapter 5**

 **River's World**

'. . . It for?' Rose asked as they appeared in a penthouse suite of the Hilton Hotel in Park Lane.

'Whoa!' John said as he looked around the plush suite. 'Won't using a teleport attract the attention of Torchwood?'

'Everyone uses them in this world. Apparently, Torchwood confiscated the technology from some off world visitors and retro engineered them.'

'That's why there was no traffic,' Rose realised.

'That's right. No cars, no trains. There are still a few light aircraft doing sightseeing flights, and boats doing pleasure cruises up and down the river.'

Rose looked around the apartment. 'How long have you been here? You seem to have landed on yer feet. This place must cost a fortune.'

'About two weeks,' River replied. 'The manager is such a sweetheart. He's let me . . . "borrow" the apartment while I waited for you to answer my call. Would you like a cup of tea? I'll call room service and get them to send a pot up.'

'Ooh, that'd be lovely thanks,' Rose replied.

John raised an eyebrow. 'How did you persuade him to lend you a penthouse suite?'

'Let's just say he likes my lipstick.'

'And how did you end up here anyway?' John asked.

'Oh, that was an old friend of yours. The Exalted Holgoroth of All Tagkhanastria.'

'Who?' Rose asked.

'A very clever, and not very nice character who has the technology to produce transdimensional manipulators,' John explained.

'He's cross with you for stealing that orb,' River said. 'Not to mention the emissary from the Crab Nebula. Apparently it took years for diplomatic relations to thaw.'

John scratched the back of his neck. 'Wellll. He'd only have used it to build a space empire. And I needed it to stop a Starman. So, what did you steal from him then?'

River had a hurt expression on her face. 'I resent that accusation.'

'Resent it, but not deny it,' John said with a lopsided smile.

'Wellll. As you said, he'd only have used it to build a space empire.' River said as she reached into her bag and took out an object the size of a tennis ball. It was an icosahedron made up of twenty triangular mirrors.

'A Dimensional Manipulator. I managed to distract Holgy and hide it in my bag. He was a surprisingly good kisser,' she remembered with a smile. 'But I digress . . . I made my excuses and left. When I tried to use my Vortex Manipulator to make my escape, Holgy had remotely activated the Dimensional Manipulator at the same time to try and get it back. The two devices must have interfered with each other and I ended up here.'

At that point, room service arrived with a tray of tea, and River poured them each a cup.

'So how did you send a message across the void?' Rose asked. 'And why can only two percent of the population hear it?'

'Two percent? Really? I used a sample of my DNA to modulate the carrier through my Vortex Manipulator and patched it through the Alexandra Palace transmitter on a chrono-loop.'

'The Ally Pally!' John exclaimed. 'That's why the hum started in the fifties. It's when the BBC started transmitting television signals.'

'I was trying to send a message to my parents as I know they travel with the Doctor. I thought I stood a better chance of rescue if they heard the message.'

Rose snorted a laugh. 'The Doctor's travelling with pensioners now? Blimey!'

'Ah. Er, actually, Amy and Rory are in their twenties,' River informed her. 'It's a bit, how does he say it, timey-wimey.'

'Amy?' Rose asked with raised eyebrows. 'Cute redhead with great legs?'

It was River's turn to look surprised. 'You've met her?'

'And Rory,' John added. 'An outstanding nurse with a worried expression?'

'You have met them. But how? You don't meet them until you . . . Well, you know, change your face.'

'Did the Doctor you know ever tell you about the Daleks creating a reality bomb in the Medusa Cascade?' John asked her.

'Yes. That was when a lot of your companions came together to defeat Davros,' River remembered. 'And it was when Donna Noble had to have her memory wiped to save her life.'

'Right. And did he tell you the side effect of Doctor Donna being created?'

'What side effect?' River asked.

'That's a no then,' Rose said.

'Instantaneous biological metacrisis,' John explained. 'The human body of Donna Noble got a Time Lord brain, and a Time Lord brain got a human body . . . Namely, this one.'

Slowly, River realised what was going on. 'So, the battle of Canary Wharf has already happened for you.'

'Years ago,' Rose confirmed.

'And you have come from the alternate reality where you live with your parents.'

'Well, not in the same house,' Rose joked. 'But yeah. Same universe.'

River turned to John. 'And he left you there with Rose?'

'To live our lives, day after day. He sacrificed his own happiness so that Rose could spend her life with me. He loved her that much.'

River had tears glistening in her eyes. 'Oh that man. Just when you think you've got the measure of him . . . Thank you for telling me. It certainly explains a lot. He made me think that he'd left you with your parents in the other universe so that you wouldn't be alone and that he wouldn't have to watch you grow old and die,' she told Rose.

'How was he after he left us?' Rose asked.

'Pretty bad after he took Donna home. He went off the rails a bit, "Time Lord Victorious" he called himself. Started breaking the rules, and that led to a situation where he had to sacrifice one of his lives to save Donna's grandfather from a lethal dose of radiation.'

'What, Wilfred Mott?' Rose asked.

'Yes. Do you know him?'

'I met him briefly when I was sent across to find the Doctor. The Doctor did the same thing for me once.' Rose saw the questioning look on River's face and looked over at her husband. 'I looked into the heart of the TARDIS to save him and it was killing me. He took the energy into himself to save me and it killed him instead.'

'I couldn't let you die,' John said. 'Even back then I loved you.'

River continued. 'It was a slow, lingering regeneration for him. It gave him chance to reflect on his life. He told me that he revisited all his old friends and companions before he regenerated.'

'Right then,' John said, disturbed by what he'd heard about his alter ego. 'So what's going on with Torchwood, and why have they grabbed this worlds Doctor and Lucie?'

'From what I can gather from the internet, over the last few months, the government have passed legislation which gives Torchwood new powers to arrest suspected aliens and hold them without trial. It's like a police state if you're an alien or an outsider.'

'If it's alien, it's ours,' John said to himself, quoting Yvonne Hartman from the original universe. 'And apparently, if you're an alien, you're an enemy of the state.'

'What will they do to the Doctor?' Rose asked.

'I can imagine,' John said. 'I remember what Henry van Statten did in that vault of his. It wasn't pleasant, and these guys have equipment that make van Statten's bunker look like a garden shed.'

'But he's the Doctor,' Rose said. 'He'll be able to take care of it.'

'Don't forget Rose that we only got out of Torchwood that time because the Cybermen and Daleks kicked off. Who knows what they'd got in store for me before they were rudely interrupted.'

'Oh yeah. So what we gonna do?'

'Well, first of all, we need information,' John told her.

'Know your enemy,' River said.

'Exactly! Do you have a computer in this apartment?' John asked River.

'On the desk over there.' River indicated an area out of sight in the "L" shaped room.

'Good. Rose, see what you can find out about Torchwood. River, show me the teleport devices you used to get us here.'

On River's right wrist was her Vortex Manipulator in the leather bracer. On her left wrist was something that looked like a smart phone. 'You can type in a street name, postcode, map reference, or use the map to locate your destination. All public areas and buildings are accessible. Private dwellings need an access code so that burglars can't just jump in and pinch stuff.'

'Sensible,' John nodded. 'And what are these key fobs?'

'Drone teleports. They're slaved to this one so that you can give people a lift.

John took out his sonic screwdriver. 'Good. Now let me have the teleport. I want to see what I can do with it.'

River unclipped the bracer and handed it over. John started scanning it, and asked questions as he worked. 'Who's in charge of Torchwood over here?'

'A woman called Yvonne Hartman,' River informed him.

John tutted. 'Oh it would be her wouldn't it.'

'You know her?' River asked.

'Well, the other "her", in the old universe. She was a megalomaniac, hell bent on establishing the British Empire all over again.'

'Oh-my-God,' Rose said from the computer desk.

John hurried over to her with River right behind him. 'What is it? What have you found? What are Torchwood up to?'

'Torchwood? Oh yeah, them,' she said sheepishly. 'I thought that before I start looking them up, I'd have a quick look at the Tyler family.'

John raised his eyebrows and gave her a withering look. 'And what did you find?'

'I married Jimmy Stone!' Rose said in amazement. 'I mean this worlds me married him.'

'Who's Jimmy Stone?' River asked.

'An old flame of hers,' John said.

'A waster,' Rose told her. 'Except in this world he's the front man of a rock band. "Jimmy Stone and the Pantheon of Discord".'

'And the Tylers?' John asked.

'Pete Tyler runs a small business from the flat on the Powell Estate. Jackie runs a hairdressing salon in Peckham, and Rose is a TV celebrity. It says here that she won the hearts of the nation when she just missed out on the gold medal at Athens and broke down in tears,' Rose read.

'The crowds and the commentators disagreed with a judge's marks and felt she should have won the gold. She did interviews with all the major channels and came over really well. When she returned from Athens, she married her boyfriend Jimmy Stone, and was offered a job presenting a TV sports quiz.'

'Hah! Isn't it brilliant how things turn out when you make a different choice,' John said.

'Yeah,' Rose agreed. 'But Jimmy still chose to fool around with Noosh Jansen, the daughter of the band's manager. Rose recently found out and filed for divorce on grounds of infidelity.'

'Still a waster then,' River said. 'Although, a bad boy is SO attractive.'

John rolled his eyes. 'Can we get back to finding information about Torchwood and rescuing the Doctor.'

Rose guiltily turned back to the computer and started searching the internet. John went back to modifying the teleport.

'So what's the plan?' River asked.

'He doesn't do plans,' Rose told her.

'Don't I know it,' River said distractedly. 'Okay. What's the thing you're going to do?'

'Well. Right about now, if this world's Torchwood is anything like the old world's version, they should have detected the TARDIS and be moving it to the warehouse in Canary Wharf.'

'WHA?!' Rose exclaimed. 'But if they've got the TARDIS then we're stuck here!'

'Ah, yes. I can see where that might be a problem,' John said as he worked on the teleport. 'How's your Greek history?' he asked Rose.

'Eh? What have the Greeks got to do with Torchwood?' Rose queried.

But River understood the reference. 'Are we talking Odysseus at the siege of Troy?'

'We are indeed. Not so much a wooden horse as a wooden box though.'

'The Trojan Horse,' Rose said as she too got the idea. 'But didn't it have the soldiers in it before they took it into the city?'

John grinned. 'It did yeah. But I think it's time we updated the legend.' He finished "sonicking" the teleport and went over to Rose at the computer. 'Have you found anything?'

'I managed to get limited access with my Torchwood login and download some info before they realised I wasn't legit and locked me out.'

'Oh good girl,' John said, kissing her on the cheek.

'Your Torchwood login?' River asked with a frown.

'Yeah. We work for Torchwood,' Rose informed her. 'Our Torchwood has been reformed by my dad. It's a force for good in our world.'

John was looking at the computer. 'Heads up. It looks like Big Brother has been watching. They've rumbled us and are tracing the connection.'

'I've downloaded the data onto my phone so that we can take it with us,' Rose told him.

'Right then. Hold onto these key fobs,' John said, handing them the teleport drone units. 'I've modified the matter stream demodulator to tap into the TARDIS emergency call protocol. Instead of the TARDIS coming to us . . .'

He pressed a button on the teleport, and the penthouse suite faded away, to be replaced by the domed, Edwardian interior of their TARDIS.

'. . . We go to the TARDIS.'

'Ooh,' River said as she looked around. 'This is your TARDIS?'

Rose smiled. 'Yeah. D'ya like it?'

'The wood panelling and the corniche décorative are a nice touch.'

'Yeah,' Rose agreed. 'We love it.'

John had moved to the monitor and checked the display. 'Rose. Plug your phone into the console and upload the data.'

'Okay.' She put her phone into the cradle and pressed "send". John watched the data scroll down the screen.

'Blimey. Parallel worlds,' he said, blowing out his cheeks. 'Hang on. I know what it's like? It's like those twins that are separated at birth and then live their lives the same.'

'Why? What have ya found?'

'Lots of people we know who won't have a clue who we are.'


	6. To The Rescue

**Chapter 6**

 **To The Rescue**

John and Rose were drinking tea with River in the living room of the TARDIS, whilst they waited for all the office staff, laboratory technicians and the like to leave for the day, so there would be fewer people around, and everything would be quieter.

Rose hesitantly broached the subject that had been playing on her mind since her husband had mentioned it. 'Can I ask you somethin' River?'

'Of course you can. Oh, as long as it isn't about the future. Spoilers and all that.'

'Oh. Right. Well, I suppose it is a bit.' She looked at John, took a deep breath and asked anyway. 'John told me that you knew him . . . y'know, when he was the Doctor. That you knew him in the future,'

'Yes. I can answer that one. Our paths cross in the wrong order. My time line seems to be backwards to his,' River explained.

'And your parents by the sound of it,' Rose added with a smile.

'Yes. I've always been a bit unconventional. A bit of a rebel.'

'You know his name. Don't ya?' Rose asked suddenly, getting to the point. She found out John's hand and held it for reassurance. He gave her hand a squeeze in return.

River realised that this was what Rose really wanted to talk about. She looked at John as she answered. 'Yes. I know his name. And you know why, don't you?'

'Yeah, 'cos I know it as well,' Rose said, and there was an awkward silence that fell like a veil over the room.

River took a sip of her tea before breaking that silence. 'Are you okay with that?'

'I don't know,' Rose answered truthfully. 'John's life is a bit unconventional as well. I mean, the man I married and the man you married are the same person. Sort of. It just seems a bit . . .'

'Wibbly-wobbly?' River suggested with a smile.

Rose laughed. 'Yeah.'

River instinctively knew what Rose needed to know. 'It took him a long time to get over you, you know. He once told me that all he ever wanted for you was to have fantastic life. I know now that he gambled everything on leaving you with John in that universe.'

Rose sighed. 'Yeah. At the time I was so angry with him for doin' that. He never even said goodbye.'

'Well. You know what he's like with goodbyes.'

'Yeah. About as good as he is with domestic,' Rose said with a laugh.

'Oi. In the room,' John reminded them.

'Yes. And we're talking about you, not to you,' River quipped, and then turned to Rose. 'Can I ask you a question? About my parents.'

'Wha? Amy and Rory? Sure you can, but they're not really your parents.'

'I know. But you said you have a father in that universe. Is he really your father?'

'Ah. Fair point . . . John spotted Amy as a potential field agent when he went to investigate a haunting in the old rectory. He invited her for a visit and she passed the entrance test. She's brilliant, and has settled in really well. Rory came with her to London and got a position as a trauma nurse in the Torchwood Hospital.'

'Any children?' River asked.

'Not yet. But I bet it won't be long . . . Hang on . . . that means . . .'

River gave her a knowing look. 'Just tell them to watch over their daughter.'

'Did something happen to you? Is that why your parents are younger than you, and that your time line is running backwards to the Doctor's?'

'Yes,' River said quietly, with a sad expression on her face.

Rose thought about what River had said. "Just tell them to watch over their daughter". Had she experienced some trauma in her childhood that she didn't want their Amy and Rory to go through? Before she could investigate further though, River turned on her charming smile.

'Now what about your family? Tell me about your children,' River said, changing the subject and drawing a line under the conversation.

They continued to chat while they waited, and knowing that Rose and John were no longer in her time line nor in her universe, River showed them her "spotters guide to the Doctor" wallet.

'Blimey! Did I really wear that coat?' John asked as he looked at the picture of his sixth incarnation. 'I must have fallen out of the bad taste tree and hit every branch on the way down.'

Rose already knew what the Doctor's faces looked like in his previous incarnations from her mental link with her husband. But he never really focussed on the clothing. She thought the wallet was brilliant and took photographs with her phone.

Rose felt that River was almost a female version of Jack Harkness (if you could make that gender definition). She was intelligent, confident to the point of arrogance, and very witty. Like Jack though, Rose wasn't sure how many of her stories were true, and how many were exaggerated. But she was polite and charming, and showed a genuine interest in their children and their life in "Pete's World".

'Right then,' John announced as he stood up. 'I think it's time to make our move. Let's go to the wardrobe and get kitted out in our old Spec Ops uniforms.'

Ten minutes later, they were in the Console Room wearing black military twill, complete with utility belts and stun guns.

'I presume you've got a plan to get past all their security?' River asked.

John flashed her a smile and fiddled with a few settings on the console. 'Yep. I'm going to do this.' He pulled down a lever, and they heard a "zzzip" sound which seemed to come from outside.

'What was that?' Rose asked him.

'Electromagnetic pulse,' John replied. 'I've just knocked out all their electronics. Anything that was switched on and working, now isn't.'

'Won't they have backup systems?' River asked.

'They will,' John said as he studied the monitor. 'And they are coming online right about now.' He pulled the lever down again and they heard another "zzzip".

'Hah! You've just taken out their backup systems!' Rose said with a grin.

'Yep. They're blind, deaf and mute. Okay, so they'll be on high alert now, thinking that they are under attack. But if we wait for them to do a manual search of the building and settle down a bit, we should be able to use our knowledge of the Tower to move around without being detected.'

'Oh that is brilliant,' Rose told him.

John waggled his eyebrows and had a smug look on his face.

Rose noticed that when River stepped out of the TARDIS, the polite and charming woman she had been chatting to was now acting like a professional soldier. 'This reminds me of the lost property office on Garazone Central, out near the Orion star system,' she whispered. 'Is that a Sunglider?'

John glanced up at it, remembering the same Jathar ship in the old universe Torchwood. 'Yeah. This lot shot it down over the Shetland Islands. Come on, we need to make our way to the detention cells. That's where they will be keeping the Doctor and Lucie.'

They crept behind crates and boxes towards the doors of the warehouse, which led to the service corridor beyond. Rose looked in a wooden crate as they went past. There were no magnaclamps in it as there had been in the old universe Torchwood.

John sonicked the lock on the doors and peeped through the gap. The corridor was clear, and he crept through the doors with Rose and River bringing up the rear. They made their way through the maze of corridors towards the underground access area, ducking back now and again as a guard walked past a junction. They passed through a door into the underground car park, which led to the underground access area and the big steel, bomb proof door.

'John. How do we get that door open?' Rose asked.

'That big wheel on the wall to the right,' John indicated. 'That's the manual override if they have a power failure.'

'There'll be a couple of warders in there guarding the prisoners,' Rose reminded him.

'That's why I want you two to wait by the door with your stunners. I'm going to slowly open the door a couple of inches, and I want you to zap them.'

Rose looked hesitant. 'It doesn't feel right. Zapping Torchwood staff. Y'know, it feels like we're zapping our own.'

'Hey. These guys are not our own. Remember the Torchwood lot in the old universe? They pointed guns at us when we landed there. Just keep that thought in your head when you pull the trigger.'

'Oh yeah. I see what y'mean.'

Rose stood by the armour plated door with her stunner drawn. River knelt down beside her and they readied their weapons as the door slowly slid back.

"Zap! Zap!" The two warders sitting at the desk never had time to react. Their mugs of tea fell to the concrete floor and smashed. Rose waited until the door was wide enough the squeeze through and hurried up the ramp onto the loading platform where the security vans would reverse in to offload their occupants.

River followed her to the desk and they disarmed the warders. John came through the door and joined them. 'Do we know which cells they're in?'

River leafed through the ledger. 'The Doctor. Alien threat. Cell two.'

'Alien threat?' Rose asked.

'Lucie Miller. Alien sympathiser. Cell five,' River read.

John was closest to cell five, so he nodded towards cell two for Rose and River to open that door. The doors had a metal wheel on them that when turned, withdrew bolts from the steel door frames. Rose pulled on the wheel once the bolts were clear, and the door swung outwards. River could see the Eighth Doctor lounging on a comfy sofa.

He sat up and smiled. 'Hello. Is it time for another chat? Your features are similar to Miss Hartman. Are you two related?'

'Hello,' River said as Rose appeared around the door. 'Er, no. It's not time for a chat. It's time to get out of here. We're the escape committee . . . And no, I'm not related to Yvonne Hartman.'

John had wound his wheel and pulled the door open, standing to one side to wait for Lucie to throw a chair or table through the doorway. A chair flew out of the cell, and John poked his head around the door. 'Hello Lucie. Do you want to stay in there all evening throwing furniture about, or do you want to get out of here?'

'Who the hell are you?' She asked, holding a mug by her shoulder, ready to launch it at a moment's notice.

'A good question,' Eight said as he, Rose and River came over.

'Oh Doctor!' Lucie cried out and ran out of the cell to hug him around the neck. 'They wouldn't tell me what had happened to you.'

'Oh I'm all right . . . I'm always all right,' he told her.

Rose rolled her eyes at that statement and laughed. Eight released the hug and looked at the trio. 'So who are you people?'

'Doctor John Smith, formerly the Tenth Doctor from an alternate reality.' John held his hand out in greeting.

'Formerly the Tenth? Alternate reality?' Eight said with a frown as he shook the offered hand.

John nodded. 'Yep, and yep.' He then continued the introductions. 'My wife Rose. Formerly a travelling companion of the Ninth and Tenth Doctors, and a general all round brilliant human being.'

'Hello,' Rose said, shaking their hands.

'And River Song. You'll have to ask her about her. Knows me in the future, and I know her in the past.'

'Happens to me all the time,' Eight said with a lopsided smile.

'Yeah. Me too,' John said. 'Although not so often these days. We'd better get a shift on. Allons-y.'

'Allons-y? Is that what I say in the future?' Eight asked as he and Lucie followed the escape committee to the door.

'Amongst other things,' River said with a saucy smile.

'I quite like it,' Lucie said. 'I think you should start using it now.'

'Allons-y then,' Eight said, winking to Lucie as they reached the big door.

There was a burst of automatic fire from outside, and bullets "zinged" off the armour plating. Everyone ducked back inside, and River drew one of the weapons she'd taken off a warder.

'Don't you dare!' John told her with a scowl. 'If you really know me, then you'll know we don't use guns. Not lethal ones anyway.' He ran over the door wheel on the wall and started to turn it, closing the blast door.

'Okay. So now what?' River asked, putting the side-arm back in her pocket. 'If you hadn't noticed, we're trapped.

'This is some rescue,' Lucie scoffed. 'What, you came in here, you don't have a plan for getting out?'

'Hang on,' Rose said. 'That was . . .'

'Maybe you'd like it back in your cell? You could throw some more furniture about,' John interrupted. 'Don't worry, I'll think of something.'

'There's the lift up to the interrogation room,' Eight suggested.

'No good. I knocked it out with an EMP,' John told him. 'And anyway, it can only be operated from the interview room. Oh, sorry. You're right. It's an interrogation room over here.'

'The EMP!' River exclaimed. She flipped the cover open on her Vortex Manipulator and started pressing buttons.

'Well I need to get up to the top floor to get my sonic screwdriver back. The director emptied my pockets during my last "interview",' Eight said.

'Top floor?' River said. 'Right, everyone hold on tight.'

'But that won't work,' John told her. 'The building inhibits teleporters.'

The scraping sound of the blast door opening made them turn and look. River grabbed John's wrist and pulled his hand onto her wrist. 'Everyone, hold my wrist.'

Rose, Lucie and Eight placed their hands on the Vortex Manipulator, and promptly vanished from the holding facility.


	7. An Unexpected Ally

**Chapter 7**

 **An Unexpected Ally**

Yvonne Hartman was sitting at her desk in the glass fronted office, on the top floor of One, Canada Square, trying to find out what the hell was going on. A team from the electronics lab had managed to get a few radios working, and she was getting sporadic reports from agents around the building.

['McNab to control. Yvonne, all the entrances to the building are intact. A force may have used the electronics failure to teleport in while the inhibitors are out of action.']

'Yes Andy, I think you may be right. What do you think they are after?'

['It could be the tech we've got here, or maybe it's a rescue mission for some of the many people we've pulled in for questioning lately,'] Andy said with a hint of undisguised irritation.

'I know you don't agree with our new policy of aggressively seeking out alien insurgents Andy,' Yvonne said in a placating tone. 'However, we have very reliable intelligence that there is an impending invasion being planned, and we have been tasked by the Prime Minister to do our utmost to prevent it. Andy, I am asking you to trust me, and carry out your duty to the best of your usual outstanding ability.'

['Of course Yvonne. I have a team protecting the research labs, and I'm taking a team to the holding facility.']

'That's great Andy, Keep me appraised of the situation.'

['Roger that. McNab out.']

Yvonne put the radio on her desk and continued working. Several minutes later, five people suddenly appeared in her office.

* * *

Andy looked at the radio as though it was the little box that had told him to shut up and get on with it, rather than the woman who was the director of the institute. He put the radio in his top pocket and thought about what Yvonne had said. Of course he would do his job, he was a soldier. You can take the man out of the SAS, but you couldn't take the SAS out of the man.

And Yvonne was right, he did have outstanding abilities. After all, he'd been a member of the most elite fighting force in the world. However, he may have been a trained killer, but he was no assassin. If there was someone threatening the public, he would take them out without a second thought. But he would not harm or kill an unarmed person who had surrendered.

'Right. Duncan has taken Andre, Julia, Craig and Gwen up to the labs. We are going down to the cells to see if anyone is trying to break out some of our "guests".'

He led Stuart, Pete and Clive out of the Standby Room to the stairs and down to the basement, where they hurried along to the holding facility.

'Andy. The door's open,' Clive noticed as they approached.

'I was right. It's a break out. We need to contain them. If anyone comes out, I want short, controlled bursts against the blast door to keep them in there. No casualties! Is that understood?'

'Understood Boss,' they replied.

'Okay. Take up your positions.'

'Allons-y then,' someone said from inside the detention cells, and then they saw shadows moving in the gap of the doorway.

'Fire!' Andy commanded, and there was the rattling sound of SA80 assault rifles pinging bullets off the blast door. The shadows moved away from the door.

'Don't you dare!' a voice said from inside. 'If you really know me, then you'll know we don't use guns . . . Not lethal ones anyway.'

Andy frowned at this. Who were these people who infiltrated a high security building and didn't use weapons. He didn't have time to contemplate this though, as the blast door started to roll shut.

* * *

'Ugh. If that's travellin' through the Vortex without a TARDIS, yer can keep it,' Rose said as they appeared in a smart, tidy office.

'What?!' a woman in a smart trouser suit said from behind a desk.

'Hello again Miss Hartman,' Eight said with a charming smile.

Yvonne reached for the top draw of her desk, but River reached over and grabbed her wrist. 'Oh I don't think so Sweetie.' She opened the draw herself and looked inside, before taking out a firearm. 'Interesting office stationery you keep in here.' She handed the weapon to Rose as Yvonne twisted her wrist free.

'Browning nine millimetre,' Rose said. She popped the magazine out and dropped it in the waste bin. She then pulled back the slider and cleared the round from the breech, which also went in the waste bin, along with the gun.

['McNab to all teams. We have a force of unknown size which has liberated two detainees from the cells. They may still be in the building so start a search of all possible hiding places. McNab out,'] the radio squawked.

'That's Andy,' Rose realised.

'They've noticed we've left then,' Lucie said with a smile.

River looked around the glass fronted office. 'We're exposed here. Rose, with me. We need to defend the entrance.'

'Yes ma'am,' Rose said with a lopsided smile.

As they moved towards the door, John caught River by the elbow. 'Hand it over.'

'What?' she asked innocently.

John gave her a silent icy stare. River rolled her eyes in submission. 'Oh, all right.' She reached into her pocket, and took out the Heckler & Koch MP5SF which she had taken from the warder, and handed it to him.

John handed the weapon to Rose, and she made it safe as she had done with Yvonne's. She then drew her stun gun and went out into the corridor with River.

'Now then Yvonne,' John said with a cheeky smile. 'My friend here has had some personal items taken from him and he'd like them back please.'

'Oh I bet he would,' Yvonne scoffed. 'So that you can use it to start the invasion.'

Eight shook his head. 'You really are deluded, aren't you?' He sat on the edge of her desk and looked intently at her face. His smile was charming, or creepily sinister, depending on your point of view.

'You're too late. It's all in the vault. And the vault is inaccessible at the moment due to an interruption of power,' Yvonne told him smugly, staring defiantly into his eyes.

But Eight was staring back, and he was staring for a reason. Yvonne was good. Her poker face was a professional, impassive mask. But the human face gave momentary, almost imperceptible clues as to what the brain was thinking as the mouth was speaking. Normally, they had to be filmed with a high speed camera and watched in slow motion. But Eight was a Time Lord, and he experienced time at a different rate to everyone else.

'So, is my property still in this office then?' Eight asked.

And there it was, her "tell" as the poker players called it. There was the briefest twitch of her mouth and blink of the eyes. He had completely ignored her lie about the vault and asked a question which told her he knew it was a lie.

'I've just told you it's in the vault,' Yvonne repeated.

'Yes you did . . . Is it in one of the desk drawers?' Her "tell" told him no. 'The filing cabinet maybe?' Her "tell" was getting easier to read as he started to get her rattled. 'Oh I know. The office safe.'

Bingo! Her face lit up like a Christmas tree. He didn't know she had an office safe, but it was a fair bet that she had. She was a paranoid xenophobe. Of course she'd have secrets, and have somewhere to hide them.

'So you do have a safe. I wonder where it is?'

'Here, let me,' John said, reaching into the breast pocket of his uniform and taking out his sonic screwdriver. He adjusted the setting and started to scan around the walls and floor. He stopped at a painting and looked at the holographic projected display on his sonic.

'Really? Behind a painting?' Lucie asked Yvonne. 'That is such a cliché.'

The painting was on a hinge, and John moved it as though he was opening a door, to reveal a safe with a handle and keypad. 'I don't suppose there's any point in asking you for the combination, is there?'

Yvonne scowled at him. 'Nah. Didn't think so.' He adjusted the sonic again and ran the blue light over the keypad. After a few seconds, the lock clicked, and John twisted the handle to open the door. He took out a plastic box and handed it to the Doctor.

'Ah, there we are,' Eight said with a smile as he started loading his pockets. He picked up a small, white paper bag and rummaged inside, taking out a jelly baby. 'Jelly baby anyone?'

'Oh I haven't had a jelly baby for ages,' John said as he helped himself to a sweet. 'I love jelly babies.'

'Me too,' Lucie said as she took one as well.

Eight offered the bag to Yvonne with raised eyebrows, but she just gave him an icy stare. 'No? I'll have yours then,' he said and popped another sweet in his mouth.

'John, are we done here?' Rose asked from the doorway. 'The longer we stay here, the greater the risk of gettin' caught. And Miss Bossy Boots is gettin' jumpy out here.'

'Yeah, we're . . .'

['Prescott to McNab. Andy, we were searching the isolation ward on the hospital floor when we found something. Over,'] Duncan Prescott announced over the radio.

['Duncan. What have you found? Over,'] Andy replied.

['We're not sure. Bodies I think. But they're covered in tendrils . . . vines of some sort.']

John and Eight gave each other knowing looks. John grabbed the radio and pressed the talk button. 'Duncan. What colour are the tendrils?'

['Er, reddish brown.']

['Who is that?'] Andy asked.

John ignored him. 'And are the tendrils held together with a membrane that cover the head?'

['This is Captain Andy McNab. Identify yourself.']

There was a pause as John presumed Duncan checked the bodies.

['Andy. Whoever that is, he's right about the tendrils,'] Duncan reported.

'We're on our way,' John said and put the radio in his pocket. 'Come on, we need to get to the second floor.' He hurried out of the office. 'RIVER. Set your manipulator for the second floor.'

As Lucie walked past the desk, she picked up the waste basket and took it with her. They found River was by the double glass doors that led onto the main corridor. John saw the waste basket and gave Lucie a questioning look.

Lucie smiled at him. 'Well, we can't leave Lady Nut Job with two weapons that she can reload, can we?'

'Oh I like her,' River said as she held out her arm. 'Right. Everyone hold on tight.'

'Oh, do we have to?' Lucie asked, not keen on having her atoms twisted into the fourth dimension and back again.

'Unless you want to run down forty three floors,' John said.

Lucie sighed, held onto River's wrist with everyone else, and disappeared from the top floor to reappear in the reception area of the hospital. 'Ugh. That is unpleasant.'

John led them past the startled nursing staff and headed down the corridor towards the isolation ward, where he pushed through the double doors.

'What the hell?!' Andy said as he spun around. 'Freeze!'

Half a dozen SA80 assault rifles turned in their direction. They raised their hands, all except John. 'Sorry Andy. Don't have time for that nonsense,' he said. 'As always, I'm unarmed. So, you can shoot me if you've had your integrity surgically removed, or you can show me those bodies.'

For once in his career, Andy was completely stumped. When he told people to freeze, they froze. The threat of a gun pointing at them being usually enough to get their cooperation. Not only had this man completely ignored him, he had implied that he knew him, and knew that he wouldn't shoot an unarmed man.

'Who the hell are you people?' Andy asked as John and Eight walked down the ward towards one of the bodies on a bed.

'I'm John Smith. I used to be him,' John said, pointing to Eight with his thumb. 'He's the Doctor. The cute blonde is Lucie. The even cuter blonde is my wife Rose, and River is . . . Well, she's just River.'

'That's Rose Tyler!' Gwen O'Toole said.

'No, I'm not,' Rose told her. 'Well, yes I am, sort of.'

John and Eight were scanning the tendril covered body with their sonic screwdrivers. 'Still alive,' Eight said.

'As to be expected,' John replied. 'Shall we find out who it is?' They started to pull at the tendrils holding the body to the bed.

'Stop right there,' Andy commanded. 'At the moment, you could be doing something incredibly dangerous for all I know. So if you don't stop, I will shoot.'

John and Eight stopped. Andy had just told them that he had made a risk assessment and needed information. John and Eight fixed him with an icy stare. 'Trust me Andy, we are not your enemies. The aliens who did this to these people are your enemies. The Earth is under threat, and we are your best chance of stopping it,' John told him.

'Trust you. Why should I trust you? And how do you know me?'

John sighed. 'I know you in a different universe. There are parallel worlds, Andy. Every single decision we make creates a parallel existence, a different dimension where things can be the same or different.'

'Oh come on,' Andy said. 'You're going to have to do better than that.'

'Andy,' Rose said. 'I AM Rose Tyler. That was my maiden name in my universe. There is another Rose Tyler in this universe. A Rose Tyler who had a different life to me. Different chances, different choices. The Andy McNab I know, is my commandin' officer where I come from. He is one of the most inspirational leaders I have ever met.'

'And would he believe a bunch of terrorists who infiltrated a secure building and told an outrageous tale?' Andy asked.

'No, probably not. Not straight away anyway. But come on. You work for Torchwood. You know how weird things can get. The Andy I know would gather intelligence, collate all the available data before makin' any rash decisions.'

'Well, I'll give you that one. But why would he trust those strangers?'

'You want me to give you proof that the other you trusts me? Okay.' Rose hesitantly looked over at John before she continued. 'A few years ago, Me and John were on a mission that went wrong. I was captured by a group of thugs and . . .'

John walked over and held her hand in support. 'And I was nearly raped. I wasn't handlin' it well. I thought I should have been better than that. Andy helped me by tellin' me about a mission that went wrong when he was in the SAS. His team were captured and he was interrogated. He told me all the details of that interrogation . . . Y'know, when he was tied to a table.'

Andy lowered the rifle. 'I've never told anyone about that outside of my old unit.'

'Neither have I,' Rose replied quietly. 'He didn't ask me to keep it private. But then he didn't have to, because he trusted me not to tell anyone.'

'Andy?' Stuart Sinclair asked. Surely he didn't believe this crazy story.

'What? Even Gwen said she was Rose Tyler.'

'There is one way to resolve this,' John suggested. 'Take this webbing off the face and see who is underneath.'

Andy looked at John and the Doctor, and then looked at each of his team, trying to assess their reaction.

'You're not thinking of listening to them are you?' Julia De Graff asked him.

'I don't see as we have much choice. They get in here without any weapons . . .' Andy started.

'Er, that's not entirely true,' Rose said sheepishly. 'We do have stun guns.'

Andy smiled at her honesty. He could see why an Andy McNab in another universe would like her. 'Without any lethal weapons. They claim that someone is preparing to invade our world. They also claim that this body will prove that they are telling the truth. I say we have a look. If they are lying, we arrest them.'

'Thank you Andy,' John said, and they started to pull the rubbery tendrils off the body. Everyone gathered around to see who was underneath. John, Rose and River doubted if they would know who it was, being from a different universe.

'Hang on,' Pete Davies started. 'That's . . .'

'Harriet Jones. The Prime Minister!' Gwen finished for him.

'Yeah. We know who she is,' John and Rose said together.


	8. Subterfuge

**Chapter 8**

 **Subterfuge**

'But if that's the Prime minister, then who the hell is running the country?' Stuart asked.

'An alien called a Zygon,' John told them.

'Some of the best and most aggressive shape shifters in the galaxy,' Eight explained.

'I think we've both saved the Earth from them on a number of occasions,' John said, looking at Eight.

Eight nodded. 'Lucie's aunt was even copied once.'

'Oh I remember that in my reality. It was back in eighty five,' John remembered. He looked around the ward. 'We need to see who the others are.'

'Okay team. Groups of two on each one and get a positive I.D,' Andy commanded.

'Where am I?' Harriet asked in a hoarse whisper.

'You're in Torchwood,' Eight told her. 'You've been attacked by an alien who wants to take over the planet.'

'But why are they all here?' Lucie asked. 'Isn't Torchwood supposed to find and detain aliens?'

'I think the reason may become apparent in a moment,' John said.

And if on cue, Stuart called out. 'Andy! You're not gonna believe this. We've got the director here, Yvonne Hartman.'

'There you go,' John said. 'Infiltrate the organisation that defends the Earth, detain any resident off worlders and eliminate any resistance.'

'So Yvonne upstairs is a Zygon then?' Rose realised. 'Hadn't someone better get up there and arrest her?'

Andy looked at John and the Doctor. 'What are we up against here? Will our weapons stop them?'

'They are stronger than humans, but just as mortal. They have venom sacs in their tongues and venomous barbs on their palms which can stun, maim or kill. You can tell if you've been stung as they leave large welts on the affected area,' John explained.

'And what do they look like when they're not looking like us?' Andy asked.

'Ooh. Big red thing covered in suckers,' John said, using his hands to indicate what suckers looked like.

'Craig, Stuart, Pete. Did you get all that?'

'Yes Boss,' they replied.

'Good. Then get up to the top floor and find it.' He turned to the other members of his team. 'Are there any more of our people here?'

It turned out that Yvonne's P.A was there, along with the head of the public relations and communication department. More agents were dispatched to round up the imposters and put them in the cells. They also found the Secretary of State for Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs, the Secretary of State for Defence, and the Lord Chancellor and Secretary of State for Justice.

That last find told Andy why they had been so busy rounding up innocent people lately, which in turn got him thinking about those people. 'And for God's sake, let those people out of the cells who shouldn't be there,' Andy commanded. 'You know who they are.'

Rose smiled at him. It might be a different universe, but it was definitely the same man. She wandered over to John and helped him free someone from the remnants of the Zygon webbing. Lucie and the Eighth Doctor were doing the same in the adjacent bed, and Rose took the opportunity to talk to Lucie now that everything had calmed down.

'Lucie, right?' she asked as a conversation starter.

Lucie turned and smiled. 'Yeah. And Rose wasn't it? But not ROSE Rose.'

Rose laughed. 'Yeah, that's right. So how long have you been travellin' with him then?'

'Let's see. What year is it? Two thousand and seven right? So the Time Lords dumped me with him last year because of something I'd seen.'

'What was it?' Rose asked. John had told her about HIS Lucie and some of their adventures, but not all of them yet.

'No idea, but whatever it was meant I was in danger. So I had to leave my home in Blackpool, and I wasn't too pleased about it I can tell you. Having to leave all my friends and family behind. But it's been a few years now, and the life style kind of grows on you.'

Eight had a lopsided smile on his face as he listened to their conversation. He knew they hadn't got off to a good start. But over the years, Lucie had come to realise that he was showing her a better way to live her life. That one person could make a difference.

'Yeah. I know what y'mean,' Rose agreed.

'So what's the story with you then?' Lucie asked.

'Yes. The former Tenth Doctor from an alternate reality. What's all that about?' Eight asked as he sat his freed victim up in the bed.

John looked over to them and smiled. He was giving someone a drink of water as he spoke. 'Ah. That one's a bit complicated. There was in incident with the Daleks in our universe . . . our old universe. They were trying to destroy reality. You'll see what I mean in a few years time when the stars start going out. So, I have an accident with a travelling companion and there's an instantaneous biological metacrisis.'

'You're a hybrid duplicate then?' Eight asked with surprise. 'I know it's a theoretical possibility, but I never knew it could actually happen. What does it feel like?'

That was a question only a Time Lord could ask. 'I feel no different to how I felt before it happened. Although, it was a bit strange seeing myself in my original body. I've only got one heart and no regenerations, but I still have all my nine hundred years of memories.'

'Nine hundred! You've got a couple of centuries on me then?' Eight said.

'That's right. Anyway, the original me left me with Rose in her dad's universe where we live our lives together.' He could see Eight's questioning look about "Pete's World". 'And that is a whole other story.'

'I bet it is,' Eight laughed.

The Prime Minister and Director of Torchwood were now on their feet and being brought up to speed on what had happened by Andy.

'I need to get to Number Ten and convene an emergency meeting of the cabinet. Yvonne, do you think I could trouble you for some transport?' Harriet asked.

'Of course Prime Minister. Andy, could you see to that?'

'Of course. Clive. The P.M needs a taxi. Look sharpish. Blues and Twos all the way,' Andy called out.

'On it Boss.'

Harriet paused. 'Oh, and Captain. Thank you for your help.'

'To be fair Ma'am, it was these people who you should be thanking,' Andy said with a sweep of his arm towards the time travelling troupe.

Harriet looked over at them, and for the first time realised who was there. 'Oh. It's you Doctor. And Miss Miller.'

Eight smiled at her. 'Yes Harriet. And it was my friends here who helped me.'

'Well, on behalf of her majesty's government I would like to say a very big thank you.'

'You're welcome,' John replied.

Harriet turned, and was led out of the hospital wing by Clive Simpson. Yvonne came over and addressed the group. 'Doctor. I know the Torchwood Foundation Charter of 1879 names you as an enemy of the Crown, however, today your actions and those of your friends, may have thrown doubt on that assumption.'

'Was that an apology?' Rose asked in a whisper.

'I think it's the closest you're going to get,' Lucie whispered in reply.

'Although I see you still have a propensity for causing chaos and mayhem wherever you go. You seem to have broken my building,' Yvonne continued, and Rose and Lucie both stifled laughs.

John raised a finger. 'Ah. That was me . . . I'm Chaos.'

Rose grinned. 'That must make me Mayhem then.'

'It was just a medium power, narrow band EM pulse. A hard reset of your systems should fix it,' John informed her.

He looked at Eight and took out his sonic screwdriver. Eight knew what he had in mind and took out his own sonic. They flipped their sonics in the air and caught them again. 'We'll nip down to the power distribution hub and check everything over for you.'

'Thank you,' Yvonne said. 'Now, I have to get to my office and find out what damage my doppelgänger has done.' She left the hospital wing with her P.A in tow.

John kissed his wife, waggled his eyebrows and left with the Eighth Doctor to reset Torchwood Tower's systems. Rose, River and Lucie continued their conversation about their lives and adventures. Rose realised that Harriet had said "her majesty's government".

'Does this world still have a royal family?' She asked Lucie.

'Yeah. Of course,' Lucie said as though it should have been obvious.

'Which means you met Queen Victoria and the werewolf.'

'Oh yeah. What did the doctor call it? A Heamavariform.'

'Yeah, that was it. And did you get a knighthood?' Rose asked with a cheeky grin.

Lucie squealed with laughter. 'Yeah. Dame Lucie of Blackpool. My mum thinks I'm making it up.'

'Mine too,' Rose laughed. 'Although Dad's world doesn't have a royal family, so I think my title doesn't count any more.'

'What happened?' Lucie asked.

'There are no Time Lords in Dad's world, so there was no one to save Queen Victoria from the were . . . the variform.'

'Oh that's horrible,' Lucie said.

['Prescott to McNab. Over,'] Duncan called over the radio.

'McNab. Go ahead Duncan.'

['Andy. I've got a Colonel Mace from UNIT at reception with orders to investigate Torchwood under Section Five of the emergency protocols. He wants us to stand down.']

'Stand Down? On whose authority?'

There was a pause. ['The Prime Minister's. Harriet Jones.']

Everyone in the ward was looking at him. 'Typical,' he said to them. 'Rescue a politician and they immediately think you had something to do with their capture.' He keyed the mike. 'Okay Duncan. Get everyone to the Standby Room and I'll come up and sort it. McNab out.'

'It's probably a routine precaution after an infiltration by an aggressive force,' River reasoned.

'Yeah. Maybe,' Andy said, but he wasn't convinced. Something didn't feel right. In the SAS, they had trained for hostage rescue scenarios. And one trick terrorists used was to pretend to be the hostage, while forcing the hostage to act as the terrorist.

Rose knew Andy well enough to know when he was troubled by something. ['John, where are ya?'] Rose thought to her husband.

['In the Switch Room, resetting the system. And as if by magic . . .'] The electronic systems in the tower flickered and spluttered to life. ['I'll be up in a minute,'] he thought back.

['NO! Just hang back. UNIT have turned up with a ministerial order to conduct an investigation.']

['It's probably routine. I should imagine they did something similar when we blew up Number Ten that time.']

['That's what River said, but Andy's not buying it, which means I'm not buying it either.']

['Okay. I've learnt to trust Andy's gut. We'll stay out of sight and wait for an update.']

['Thanks Love. I'll be in touch.'] Rose moved over to Andy. 'I know that look on MY Andy's face. What's up?'

'I can't put my finger on it, but something doesn't sit right,' Andy told her.

'That's good enough for me,' Rose said. 'How can we help?'

'You're Special Operations, yeah?' Andy asked.

'Yeah. You trained me. If you know what I mean,' Rose answered.

'Okay. We're going up to the Standby Room. Stay sharp and hang back a little. As far as anyone here knows, you're just civilians. Do you have any weapons?'

Rose looked at River. 'Two stun guns between us.'

Andy frowned. 'That'll have to do.'

'No wait!' Lucie said, and went over to a waste basket. She rummaged through the waste paper and pulled out two handguns. 'Will these do?'

Andy grabbed her face and kissed her forehead. 'You beauty!'

Andy led his team up the stairwell to the next floor and went through the stairwell door into the Special Operations Department. Rose put her arm out to hold back River and Lucie, and held the door ajar so that they could hear what was going on.

Andy walked into the Standby Room and could see some of his agents were already there, sitting on the comfy sofas drinking coffee and tea.

'Captain McNab? Colonel Mace. It's an honour to meet you,' Mace said with a salute.

Andy returned the salute. 'I wish I could say the same. What's all this about?'

'Standard operating procedure after a terrorist attack. Alien or otherwise. We need to make sure we've got all the suspects and that the area is secure.'

'The area is secure,' Andy told him, as if he was questioning his professionalism.

'Yes, I'm certain it is Captain. This is no slight on your command. I will need all of your team to surrender their weapons for the duration of the investigation, and for everyone to remain in this room,' Mace informed him. UNIT soldiers moved into positions to confiscate the weapons.

'And is that standard operating procedure?' Andy asked, looking around at the UNIT soldiers.

'Yes. Of course.'

'And where are your search teams? It's a big building. With this small detachment it's going to take you a week to do a proper search.'

'That is not your concern Captain . . . Your weapons . . . Please,'

Andy gave Mace an icy stare for a long time before slipping the SA80 rifle off his shoulder, handing it over by the strap, and taking his Heckler & Koch MP5SF out of his holster and handing it over by the barrel. 'Hand them over people.' The rest of the team followed his lead and reluctantly gave up their weapons.

Meanwhile, in the director's office on the top floor, Yvonne Hartman was making a telephone call to report what the Zygon had been doing during her absence.

['Report Director. How are our plans progressing?'] a voice asked over the phone.

'We are fortunate. The Zygons were planning an invasion, so they continued with a similar strategy. A number of individuals who pose a threat to the mission were apprehended and taken into custody,' Yvonne reported.

['Fortunate indeed. Then we can continue with our original timetable.']

'We may have a problem. The Special Operations captain released some of the detainees when he realised that it was the Zygons that had ordered their detention.'

['Then rearrest them,'] the voice said with some irritation. ['I'll have the captain executed so that he can't interfere again.']

'There is something else General. One of the detainees was released before the others by a small team of infiltrators. An alien and his human companion . . .'

There was a pause on the phone. ['Tell me. What was the name of this alien?']

'The Doctor.'

['NO!']


	9. Confrontaion

**Chapter 9**

 **Confrontation**

John and Eight were in the Switch Room of the Power Distribution Hub of Torchwood Tower, using their sonic screwdrivers to isolate the power to the electronic systems before restoring the power.

['John, where are ya?'] Rose thought in his head.

['In the Switch Room, resetting the system. And as if by magic . . .'] He pressed the button on his sonic, and the control panels beeped before the indicator lights went green and the cabinets started to hum. ['I'll be up in a minute,'] he thought back.

['NO! Just hang back. UNIT have turned up with a ministerial order to conduct an investigation.']

['It's probably routine. I should imagine they did something similar when we blew up Number Ten that time.']

['That's what River said, but Andy's not buying it, which means I'm not buying it either.']

['Okay. I've learnt to trust Andy's gut. We'll stay out of sight and wait for an update.']

['Thanks Love. I'll be in touch.']

'We may have a problem,' John told Eight.

Eight had been watching John, and suspected he was communicating telepathically. 'You shared your name with Rose, didn't you?'

'Of course. She's my wife,' John replied with a smile. 'Apparently UNIT have turned up to investigate, but Andy isn't convinced.'

'Hmm. So what are we going to do?'

'Rose is keeping an eye on things, so it's probably best if we keep out of sight for a while. UNIT don't know we are here so if we need to take action we can do it covertly.'

Eight nodded, and they started chatting to pass the time. 'So how did you get a TARDIS then?'

'My other self gave me a piece of coral when he dropped us off in "Pete's World",' John explained.

'Who's Pete?'

'Rose's dad. In our universe, he died when Rose was a baby. In the other universe, he's alive and a very successful businessman. He also became director of Torchwood there and cleaned it up.'

'And he just accepted her as his daughter?' Eight asked in surprise.

'Not at first, no. But when Rose's mother appeared after Pete's wife died, he came around,' John told him.

'It sounds like a convoluted plot from a Shakespeare play . . . Hang on. Did you say you had a piece of coral? But that would take thousands of years to grow into a TARDIS,' Eight said.

'Yeah, but I shatterfried the plasmic shell and modified the dimensional stabiliser to a foldback harmonic of thirty six point three. I accelerated growth by the power of fifty nine.'

Eight raised his eyebrows in admiration. 'That is brilliant!'

'Yeah, it was,' John said with a sad look on his face. 'Not my idea though. It was Donna . . . You know, the other half of the metacrisis.'

'Ah. I'm sorry.' Eight knew a human couldn't survive a metacrisis.

'Thanks. But she didn't die. Other me saved her by wiping her memory. He was as good as dead to her though, because she didn't even know he existed . . . or me.'

Eight put a hand on John's shoulder. 'That's rough.'

['John. Special Operations is in lock down. It's like they're under house arrest or somethin','] Rose thought in John's head.

['Are you there too?']

['No. Andy asked us to hang back. I'm with River and Lucie in the corridor outside. To say UNIT are supposed to be conductin' a search, I can't see much evidence of it.']

'It looks like Andy's gut was right,' John thought and said at the same time. 'I think we need to have a chat with the real Yvonne Hartman and see if she knows what the Prime Minister is up to.'

['That's what River says. We'll meet you on the top floor then.']

[Okay. You can use the lifts now so we'll see you there. And Love, be careful. Someone is keeping Special Operations out of the way for a reason.']

['Okay. You be careful too, yeah.']

* * *

Down in the Standby Room, Colonel Mace was listening to some instructions on his earpiece comms unit. He nodded to himself and looked at Andy.

'Captain McNab. Your director is concerned that on your own volition, you decided to release some of the detainees from the secure holding facility.'

'That's right. It was the Zygon who had ordered the detentions, so I rescinded the order,' Andy told him.

'It wasn't the Zygons orders though. It was the government's,' Mace said.

'Yeah. A government whose leader was an alien planning to invade the Earth,' Andy countered.

'Nevertheless, Director Hartman as asked that you be detained in the secure holding facility until a disciplinary hearing can be convened,' Mace said with a hint of satisfaction.

'You are kidding. This is a joke, right?' Andy said in disbelief.

'Gray and Harris,' Mace called to two privates. 'You know what to do. Escort the captain down to the cells.'

'Sir!' They had their rifles held ready and ushered Andy towards the lift doors. Andy looked at them intently for a few seconds before turning his back on them and walking towards the lifts. They didn't see the smile on his face.

* * *

Yvonne Hartman looked up in surprise as John, the Doctor, Rose, Lucie and River barged their way into her office.

'Hello Yvonne. We didn't get properly introduced downstairs, did we?' John said with a winning smile. 'John Smith, a relative of the Doctor here. Well, sort of relative. This is Rose. She's my wife. And this is River, she's a bit of an enigma. Not married yet are you?'

River looked a bit bemused by his runaway mouth. 'Er, yes. I am actually.'

'Oh yes. That's right. Sorry. It's your husband who isn't married yet isn't it?'

'What in God's name are you on about?' Yvonne asked in annoyance. 'I am very busy.'

'Yes, of course you are. A lot to catch up on after all that Zygon business I bet,' John agreed.

'Yes exactly. It was very nice meeting you all. Now if you don't mind?' Yvonne said with a raised eyebrow.

John frowned. 'What?' And then he realised. 'Oh. Right. Very busy. Of course you are.' He moved towards the door, and the others followed. He put his hand on the handle and then turned back towards Yvonne. 'But shouldn't you be resting after your ordeal?'

'Thank you for your concern, but I am fine. You know what they say, "no rest for the wicked".'

'You must be particularly wicked then,' Eight said with a mischievous smile. 'Even before you were a Zygon.'

John grinned at Eight. 'Oooh. That was good.'

They went through the door of the office, and then John stopped and leaned his head back through the door. 'Me and my head. Too much stuff floating about. I'd forget it if it wasn't attached. I nearly forgot why we came up here. UNIT, they've come to search the building?'

'Yes,' Yvonne said suspiciously.

'Why? Doesn't Harriet trust you any more?' John asked.

'Of course she does. Not that it is any of your business. It's . . .'

'Standard operating procedure,' John finished for her, rolling his hand in the air. 'Yeah, that's what River said. Only a friend of ours is getting a bit of indigestion trying to swallow that.'

The rest of the group started to filter back into the office as Yvonne replied. 'Perhaps you could call into the pharmacy on your way out and get an antacid.'

'Ah, yes. We could. But we're not leaving yet. There's a few loose ends to tie up. It'll mess with my OCD if I don't tie them up,' John said with his cheeky smile.

'You are leaving,' Yvonne said with a hint of menace in her voice. 'And you are leaving right now.'

'And who's going to make us?' River asked. 'You and whose army?'

Rose stepped up. 'Yeah. 'Cos at the moment, your army is being held at gunpoint in the Standby Room.'

'Why is that do you think?' Eight asked. 'It's almost as if you don't want anyone to be able to put up any armed resistance.'

Yvonne's hand started to move towards the top drawer of her desk.

'Yeah. But armed resistance to what?' John asked. 'Not a Zygon invasion. We've prevented that. So, is there another invasion being planned?'

Yvonne opened the draw and frowned. She started to rummage through the items of stationery.

'Looking for this Sweetie?' River said, holding the Browning nine millimetre handgun.

John rolled his eyes and snatched it off her. 'What is it with you and guns?'

'Well. Someone's got to keep my husband alive,' River said with a charming smile.

John pointed a finger at her in a gesture that said "don't, just don't". He handed the weapon to Rose, who checked the safety was on and then put it in her pocket. 'Right then. I think we need to speak to UNIT. Shall we go?'

Yvonne stood, walked around the desk, and out of the door. They followed her down the corridor towards the lift, where they noticed a lift was already coming up. Rose and River readied their stunners, just in case. The lift doors opened, and it was fair to say they weren't expecting what they saw.

John raised his eyebrows and laughed. 'Blimey. It's Rambo!'

* * *

Andy walked to the back the lift when the doors opened and turned around. 'Should I put my hands behind my head?' he asked, doing it anyway.

'If you like,' Harris said as they followed Andy into the carriage. 'Might as well make it look proper.'

'I'm guessing that what you are about to do isn't proper then?' Andy asked as the doors closed. Andy was in full "special forces" mode now, and he could tell that these two soldiers were about to do something that went against the Geneva Convention. His senses were heightened and he was aware of everything the soldiers were doing. It was all about seizing the moment. Who dares, wins.

Gray was to his right, his back against the wall of the lift carriage. Harris was to the right of the door, and turned his back to operate the lift controls. Andy's right hand moved slowly down the back of his neck, under his collar, and down towards his shoulder blades.

Harris pressed the "Basement" button, and as the lift started to descend, he heard an odd ripping sound, the sound of surgical tape being ripped off skin. He casually turned away from the doors and froze. His colleague Gray, had a Heckler & Koch MP5SF handgun with bits of surgical tape hanging from it, pressed underneath his chin. The rifle Gray had been holding was now pointing right at him.

'Press the stop button,' Andy commanded, but Harris didn't move, either out of fear or confusion.

Andy pressed the handgun a little harder under Gray's chin. 'I can always press it myself after I've eliminated the obstacles.'

Harris was galvanised into action and hurriedly pressed the stop button. 'So what were your orders?' Andy asked them.

'To take you down to the secure holding facility and put you in a cell,' Harris told him. He was holding his rifle across his body. His right hand on the handle, his left hand on the barrel.

'Okay. With your left hand, slowly lower your rifle to the floor and then slide it over to me with your foot,' Andy told him. Harris complied and Andy put his boot on the rifle. 'Now that was the answer to give to your prisoner. You are now MY prisoner, and I out rank you Private. So what were your real orders?'

'To take you down to the secure holding facility and execute you.'

'And who gave you those orders?'

'Director Hartman.'

It was fair to say that Andy wasn't expecting that answer. 'Okay, now, both of you. Using your thumbs and forefingers, carefully remove your side-arms and drop them on the floor.' The soldiers started to remove their handguns from their holsters. 'Easy! At the moment I am very highly strung. I'd hate for us to have a misunderstanding, if you get my meaning.'

The soldiers definitely got his meaning. They slowed their motions right down and carefully dropped their guns on the floor. 'Good lads. Now I want you to slide down the wall and sit with your legs out straight,' he said to Harris.

Harris slid down the wall and sat down. 'Now put your hands under your buttocks, palms up with knuckles on the floor,' Andy instructed. In this position, Harris would not be able to make any sudden moves.

Andy took the gun from under Gray's chin and backed into the corner of the carriage, where he could train the weapons on both of them. He instructed Gray to sit in the same manner, and then pressed the button for the top floor. He wanted to know why Yvonne Hartman was giving orders to have him eliminated.

He rounded up the handguns with his boot, and then put the strap of the rifle he was holding over his head and left shoulder. He picked up the other rifle and put that over the other shoulder. He picked up one of the handguns and put it in his holster, before picking up the second and holding it in his left hand.

He stood at the back of the carriage looking like a one man army, which being an SAS soldier, he was. The lift "dinged" as it arrived and the doors slid open. He heard someone laugh as they said, 'Blimey. It's Rambo!'

Andy grinned at his new friends. 'I wish I could do half the stuff he does without special effects.'

'Andy, thank goodness you're here,' Yvonne said quickly. 'These people are trying to kidnap me. They have weapons. Shoot them, quickly.'

'Ah Director. I was coming to see you. These two sweethearts had orders to take me down to the secure holding facility, but somehow I don't think they were going to put me in a cell. And apparently, Colonel Mace received those orders from you. Any comment?'

'I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about Andy. Take these people into custody and we can sit down and work out what's going on.' Yvonne suggested.

'I've got a better idea,' Eight said. 'We were going down to the Standby Room to speak to the UNIT leader, this Colonel Mace anyway. We can ask him about his orders, can't we?'

'Somehow, I don't think he's going to be happy to see us,' Andy said. 'Especially me.'

'Well, that's never stopped me before,' John said, and nodded sideways at his wife. 'Just ask her mum.'

'Well, what are we waiting for then?' Eight asked them 'Allons-y! You know, I think it's growing on me.'

'Maybe I should introduce you to the word "Geronimo",' River said.

Eight stopped and looked to the ceiling as he thought about it. 'Geronimo. Ger-On-Imo. Gero-Nimo. Even Geron-Imo. No. Doesn't do it for me like Allons-y.'

'It will,' River said saucily. 'One day.'


	10. The Tables Are Turned

**Chapter 10**

 **The Tables Are Turned**

The small group were gathered outside the doors of the Standby Room whilst Andy ran through the final checks with Rose and River.

'Okay. So, are you ready?' Andy asked them. He was putting his life in the hands of these strangers, and he hoped his judge of character hadn't abandoned him.

'Yeah. We're ready Boss,' Rose said with a lopsided smile. She knew if she used his nickname it would give him more confidence in her abilities.

He nodded and positioned Gray and Harris in front of the doors, with the two rifles in their backs. Yvonne was standing by the side of him. He prodded the rifles into their spines and urged them forwards. The double doors pushed open and they strode into the Standby room. As the doors closed, they were held open slightly by River's boot.

The UNIT soldiers looked around and immediately raised their weapons. Mace looked surprised to see them. 'What the devil? What are you doing here?'

Andy walked right into the middle of the room so the soldiers would surround him. The members of the Watch stood up, ready to act if needed.

'SIT DOWN!' Mace ordered.

The Watch looked to their commanding officer, and he nodded for them to comply, but also used his eyes to cast a glimpse at the floor, indicating that he wanted them down as low as possible. Their expressions told him that they understood and they sat down.

'Director, what is the meaning of this?' Mace asked Yvonne.

'What is going on,' Andy answered. 'Is that I am taking back control of the watch, and placing you under arrest along with the director.'

Mace laughed derisively. 'You and whose army, Captain. In case you hadn't noticed, you are surrounded and outnumbered. You are no longer in control of the Watch Captain, UNIT is. By order of the Prime Minister herself.'

'Even the Prime Minister isn't above the law Colonel,' Andy reminded him.

'Quite so. But the hand that rocks the cradle,' Mace quoted.

'Is the hand that keeps the child asleep so that it can't see what's going on,' Andy finished for him. 'But I'm still alive, wide awake, and keen to find out what's going on.'

'As I said before Captain, you are outnumbered. Put down your weapons and you may live to see another day,' Mace said.

Andy looked around at the UNIT soldiers, before looking back at Mace. He lowered his rifles and looked down. 'Oh look. One of my bootlaces has come undone.' He dropped down onto one knee to apparently fasten it up again.

"Zap, zap, zap-zap-zap, zap, zap."

Had Colonel Mace had the time to look at Andy's boots, he would have seen that they were both laced up. He didn't have the time however, because the Standby Room was full of blue-white energy bolts flying from the doorway, across the room, and striking the members of his patrol.

When Andy had mentioned his bootlace, the members of the Watch had rolled off their seats onto the floor, knowing what was coming next. This was a special forces technique that Andy had trained them in for engaging with an unknown force in the theatre of war.

One member of the team would take point and go and speak to a patrol. He would engage them in conversation to ascertain if they were friend or foe. If they were friend, he would take them back to the team. If they were foe, he would either mention his bootlace, or offer a packet of cigarettes which he would drop. When he stooped down, shots would fly over his head from his team and take out the foe.

Andy stood up and looked around at the unconscious soldiers with a satisfied smile. He looked back to the doors to see Rose and River coming into the room. 'Nice shootin' Tex.'

Rose and River grinned, looked at each other and blew imaginary smoke off the front of their stun guns. Without being asked, the members of the Watch moved to the soldiers and took their weapons. Mace stood in stunned silence, trying to comprehend what had just happened. Yvonne just looked around at the downed soldiers with mild interest.

'Sit-Down!' Andy said to Mace and Hartman, in a cold, threatening voice that left them in no doubt of what would happen if they didn't comply. Mace and Hartman sat side by side on one of the sofas.

'By the authority granted to me as a Torchwood Special Operations Agent, I am arresting you for conspiracy to commit murder. Conspiracy to overthrow a duly elected government, and conspiracy to commit treason. You do not have to say anything. But, it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court. Anything you do say may be given in evidence. Do you understand the caution?' Andy said with some satisfaction.

Mace and Yvonne just glared at him. 'I'll take that as a yes then. So, let's get straight to the point. Who are you working for? Who's pulling your strings?'

'Andy. What has happened to you? Why are you doing this? Jeopardising your illustrious career?' Yvonne asked, acting as his employer.

'You know, it's ironic. Because me and the Doctor were going to go once we'd fixed the power,' John interrupted. 'We're not big on goodbyes, just sort stuff out and go. That's us. We'd sorted the Zygons and the power, and thought that was it.'

'However. You then called in UNIT on the pretence of conducting a search and disarmed the Watch,' Eight said. 'Then you did something really stupid. You tried to eliminate the leader of the Watch. Apparently because he'd freed a lot of people who were arrested for being different.'

'Now why would you do that?' John asked. 'Why would you disarm a force defending the planet when they've just proved that you need them? Unless . . .'

'Unless the Zygons weren't the only threat,' Eight said.

'What? You mean there's another invasion comin'?' Rose asked.

'Yes. And they've been planning it for a while,' John explained. 'It started weeks ago when they took over Parliament to introduce new legislation which gave Torchwood new powers to arrest suspected aliens and hold them without trial.'

'That was on the internet,' River remembered. 'So it wasn't the Zygons?'

'No. The Zygons came and copied the copies of the humans. The question is, who are the original copiers?' John said.

'So who are Yvonne and Mace?' Lucie asked.

'Well. We don't know yet, do we?' John answered.

Eight rubbed his chin as he thought. 'Well, there are a number of shape shifters we know of. The Kymbra Chimera for instance.'

'Hmm. But they're no good at copying clothing. It appears fused to the flesh,' John recalled. 'What about the Brancheerians from the planet Sirus?'

'Yeah, they could hold the copy, but it's not really their style. They've always been a friendly bunch,' Eight said.

'Oh yeah. You're right. The Gizou could have done it,' John said and took out his sonic screwdriver to scan Yvonne and Mace. 'Nah. no proteus particles.'

'What about the Gwanzulum?' Eight asked. He went over to Yvonne. 'Are you an energy leech? Is the real Yvonne dying somewhere in this building?'

'Oh. Hang on, hang on!' John suddenly had a flashback to the old universe. He went over to Mace and sniffed him. 'Nah. Testosterone . . . What is that aftershave . . . Paco Rabanne?'

'John? What are y'doin'?' Rose asked.

He held his hand up in a "just a moment" gesture, and started sniffing Yvonne. 'Garnier shampoo . . . Chanel cologne. But what is that masking?' He took Yvonne's hand and looked at it, sniffed it, and . . .

"No", Rose thought. Surely he wasn't going to.

But he did. He licked the back of Yvonne's hand. Yvonne pulled her hand away in disgust, and John stuck his tongue out and pulled a face as though he had just licked the sourest lemon you could imagine.

'Yeuch! That's . . . That's . . .'

'Disgusting,' Rose said, meaning his habit of tasting things.

'No. Well, yes. It was disgusting. A sort of fishy, cheesy disgusting. But the other thing it is, is alien!'

It may have been talking about Donna Noble earlier that had triggered it. But he recalled when Donna had first met Martha Jones. 'Andy. Is there somewhere here in the building where you keep specimens secure? I know you've got the warehouse for the big stuff, and the vault for the smaller stuff. But what about the living, organic stuff?'

'Yeah. The Biological Research Facility,' Andy informed him.

'Take us there.'

* * *

'John. Is this where I think it is?' Rose asked as they stopped in front of a big, ochre yellow door with strengthening mouldings embossed into it.

'Yeah. The "Sphere Room",' John confirmed.

'What's the sphere room?' Eight asked.

'In our old universe, it was a room that held a void ship which had punched its way into our world from the void,' John explained.

John and Eight looked at the complex lock to the side of the door. It was a copper coloured disk on a black plate, held away from the wall on a column which had a number of rods projecting outwards.

'You wouldn't like to open it for us would you,' John asked Yvonne. She gave him a withering look. 'Didn't think so.'

He put his brainy specs on and looked at the lock. 'So what do you reckon?' he asked Eight.

Eight joined him and leaned forwards to inspect the lock. 'Hmm. Deadlock seal. How long do you think it will take to break the deadlock?'

John took his sonic screwdriver out of his pocket. 'On my own, probably five or six hours.'

Eight took his sonic out. 'And together?'

'Ooh, I don't know. Five or six minutes,' he said with a smile.

'Then let's do it!' Eight said.

Eight started firing a stream of pulses at the lock's software architecture to initiate a response. John detected the response pulses and stored them. After a few minutes, he'd recorded the encoded signals of the locks combination. He then fed those signals back to the lock's software, where Eight modified them to become command functions. In electronic terms, they were turning the tumblers on the safe.

There was a clunk and a rumble as the door slid back into the wall, revealing the room inside. There was no sphere though, just several beds with naked bodies strapped to them, each wearing an electronic headset. But it was the object at the far end of the room which caught John's attention. A big, copper coloured block with a cylindrical tunnel cut into it, big enough to stand in. There were horizontal slits cut into the cylinder, lit with purple light, and two white strips either side. On the right hand side was a control console.

John ran up to it. 'Ah-ha. I knew it!'

'John, what is it?' Rose called to him.

'It's a teleport,' he replied.

'But teleports don't work inside Torchwood,' Rose remembered.

'Not those bracelet ones, no. They're open broadcast transceivers. If the destination is inhibited, the transmitter can't send. But this . . . This is a closed circuit. There is always somewhere to send and receive, even within an inhibitor field.'

'Who's is it?' Eight asked.

'Sontarans,' John told him with a cold voice. They both knew that meant trouble. 'I came across this in the old universe with Donna and Martha. Martha was cloned, but I spotted that straight away.' He rubbed his nose. 'This nose of mine isn't as good as it used to be. Or maybe it's because I knew Martha's scent from her travels in the TARDIS.'

He gave a cheeky, open mouthed smile. 'Nothing wrong with the tongue though, eh Rose?' He clicked his tongue and gave her a wink. She immediately blushed at the thought of what he did to her with that tongue.

She tried to put that thought to the back of her mind and recover her composure. 'Who are the Sontarans?' she asked. That was one species she'd never encountered in her travels with the Doctor.

'Angry little Hobbits. Imagine Mr Potato Head with an attitude and a huge inferiority complex. A warlike clone race that just want to kill anyone who is taller than themselves. Which is why I'd better do this.' He sonicked the control pad, which flashed, banged, and emitted a shower of sparks, causing the lighting strips to go out. 'That should stop any uninvited guests.'

The rest of the group had moved over to the beds and were looking at the people strapped to them. 'Oh my God! That's Harriet Jones again,' Lucie exclaimed.

John went to join her. 'Oh yeah,' he smiled, and then pulled a face. 'And she's got no clothes on.' He put a hand up to the side of his face so that he couldn't see her body.

River on the other hand was giving her an admiring glance. 'Mmm. Not bad. A surprisingly fit body for her age.'

Eight was at another bed. 'And I believe he's the Secretary of State for Defence.'

Andy had a gun trained on Yvonne, and he moved her over to another bed. 'Recognise her?' he asked her. Lying on the bed was a naked Yvonne Hartman.

'Ah, awkward,' John said as he approached the bed. 'I'm so sorry,' he said to the Yvonne who was standing by the bed. He reached for the headset.

'NO. Don't. Please,' the standing Yvonne pleaded.

John's brown eyes were full of sadness. 'I'm sorry, I must. You're just a copy, and believe me, I know how that feels. But you've been made to steal her life, and now it's time to give it back.' John lifted the headset off the real Yvonne, and the false Yvonne cried out as she fell to the floor.

The real Yvonne's eyes opened wide as she gasped. She tried to sit up but couldn't due to the restraints. Rose and Lucie started to unbuckle the straps. 'Where am I? What's happened to me . . . There were these dwarves with heads . . .'

'We know Yvonne,' Andy told her. 'It's okay, you're safe.'

River was on one knee, using her scanner on the false Yvonne. 'Her heart has gone into atrial fibrillation. Multiple organ failure . . . She's dying.'

Yvonne sat up as Rose pulled the bed sheet out from the edges of the bed and wrapped it around her. She was staring at the dying copy of herself lying on the floor. 'Who is she?'

'She's you,' John told her. 'Well, a clone of you. But all she's ever known is being Yvonne Hartman. That headset was keeping her body in sync with yours. Memories, emotions, biorhythms, everything. Once the headset was removed, everything went out of sync and into catastrophic failure.'

River was looking at the other people who were being freed from the beds and wrapped in sheets. 'John. Am I missing something? There isn't a body for Colonel Mace here.'

'Ah, yes. You won't find any for Gray or Harris either. They weren't part of the executive invasion committee. They're just the "grunts" who carry out the orders. The Sontarans will be using mind control to give them those orders,' John explained. 'And I think it's about time we had a word with them.'


	11. The Ultimatum

**Author's note:** So here it is, the final chapter, and John and the Doctor offer a way out for the Sontarans. Will they take it?  
A big thank you to Alpha007 for reminding me that there are still mysteries out there to be investigated.  
A big thank you to everyone for reading the story. I hope you enjoyed it.

 **Chapter 11**

 **The Ultimatum**

In the Standby Room, the members of the Watch were sitting on the comfy sofas, guarding the UNIT patrol who were sitting cross legged on the floor, when Andy led everyone into the room, along with the rescued people wrapped in sheets. 'Numbers. Ace, see if you can rustle up some spare uniforms for these people.'

Craig Rimmer looked at the odd collection of people. He recognised the director of Torchwood, who seemed to be looking after another woman. 'Blimey. Is that . . ?'

'Hello. Harriet Jones, Prime Minister,' Harriet said, holding out her hand in greeting.

'Er, yeah. I know who you are,' Craig replied, shaking the offered hand. 'I'll . . . I'll just go and find you some clothes.'

'If you would. That would be most kind.'

John and Eight had moved to the group of soldiers sitting on the floor, and were scanning them with their sonic screwdrivers.

'I'm not getting a ping back from all of them,' Eight said. 'Just the Colonel and the two privates. I presume the others were just following orders.'

John checked the readout on his sonic. 'Yeah. How many times has that been used as a defence.

'I've managed to isolate the frequency of the command signal,' Eight informed him.

'If we invert the signal and feed it back, we should be able to cancel it out,' John suggested.

John and Eight adjusted their sonics and pointed them at the soldiers. They all cowered away, wondering what was going to happen to them.

'Don't worry, this won't hurt,' Eight reassured them.

'Much,' John added. They activated their sonics, and Mace, Gray, and Harris clutched their temples as they gasped and keeled over. No sooner had they rolled onto the floor, they lowered their hands and shook their heads.

'Wha . . . What's going on,' Mace asked as though he had just woken from a bad dream.

Andy held his hand out to him to help him to his feet. 'Welcome back Colonel.'

Mace took Andy's hand and climbed to his feet. 'Back from where?'

'From hell by the look of you,' Andy said with a grin.

'That worked well,' John said with a satisfied smile. 'Right, let's go through to the Communications Hub in the Despatch Office and make a phone call. Who's on Comms this evening?'

'Chrissie Anderson,' Andy informed him. 'She's our Senior Technical Operations Officer.'

The Comms Hub was a bank of keyboards, knobs, dials, multimedia sliders, buttons and switches, under a wall of media screens, satellite uplinks and downlinks.

'Chrissie!' Rose called out as she hurried over to her friend who had been her mentor when she first started at Torchwood.

'Yes. I'm Chrissie. Can I help you?' she said, but Rose had already grabbed her in a hug. 'Hang on . . . You're Rose Tyler off the telly.'

Rose released the hug and blushed with embarrassment. 'Ah, parallel worlds . . . Sorry.'

'Hello "Brains",' John said as he wandered in after his wife.

'Do I know you? Because you both act as though you know me,' Chrissie said with a frown.

'Parallel world,' Rose reminded him.

'Course it is,' John said. 'Doesn't stop us knowing them though, does it? Right "Brains", I've got a couple of questions. Firstly, does Torchwood still have that weapon you used on the Sycorax that Christmas?'

'How the hell did you know about that? Chrissie leaned past him to look to the Watch leader. 'Andy?'

Andy smiled at her. 'He's John. She's Rose. That's the Doctor. She's Lucie. That's River, and this is complicated. Together they are saving the world, so give them anything they need.' He turned to John. 'Yes. We've still got it. Will that destroy these Sontarans?'

'Well, yeah. But we're not going to,' John said cryptically. 'Chrissie. Do NASA track space junk in this universe?'

She was having trouble keeping up with John's thought processes. 'Er, yes. They do.'

'Good. Now, there's a great big alien ship a few thousand miles over our heads. Can you find me a hunk of junk near to it? Ooh, I like that. A hunk a junk.'

Chrissie searched the database and found some results. 'There's a decommissioned telecommunications satellite within five hundred miles.'

'Oh well done! Can you lock the weapon onto the satellite and have it ready to fire?'

'Yes. I've got the tracking data from NASA. I can feed that into the targeting computer,' Chrissie told him.

'Brilliant! And finally, I need you to open up a carrier wave on this frequency.' He showed her the holographic display above the sonic screwdriver.

'Okay, if you're sure.' Chrissie's hands flew over the controls, and they heard white noise coming out of the speakers.

'Calling the Sontaran Command Ship under Jurisdiction Two of the Intergalactic Rules of Engagement. This is Doctor John Smith and the Doctor.'

On one of the screens, an angry looking potato appeared. ['The Doctor?! The loathsome, meddlesome Time Lord?'] the Sontaran growled.

'Ooh. He's got your number,' Lucie said cheekily.

Eight looked hurt by the Sontaran's words. 'I've been called "some" things in my time, but I take exception to loathsome.'

At that point, Yvonne Hartman walked in wearing a uniform that was too big for her. She had the sleeves and trousers rolled up to fit. 'That's better. Now, what's occurring?' She saw the Sontaran on the screen. 'Oh, I say. It looks like some kind of troll.'

John grimaced. 'Oof. Not really a helpful observation when the troll can destroy your planet. It's called a Sontaran. And his name is . . ? John said, inviting the Sontaran to give his name.

['General Staal, of the Tenth Sontaran Fleet,'] the Sontaran announced.

'Staal the Undefeated?' John asked, wondering just how parallel this parallel world was.

['No. Staal the Unstoppable.']

'The unstoppable, really?' John asked. 'Well, I'm John the Immovable. And I think by the end of the day, one of us is going to need a new nickname.'

'You know, I always wondered how that paradox would turn out,' Eight said.

['By the end of the day, you will be John the Deceased,'] Staal boasted.

'Deceased? Nah, don't like that nickname. John the Defeated? John the Conquered? John the Humbled?' He pulled a face. 'Not really doing it for me. All a bit negative.'

'How's the war with the Rutans going,' Eight asked whilst John thought about his nickname.

['That is not your concern,'] Staal told him. ['We will be victorious.']

'What war is that?' Andy asked.

'It's been raging, far out in the Mutter's Spiral, for fifty thousand years,' Eight told him.

'Fifty thousand years of bloodshed,' John added. 'And you want to invade the Earth. That doesn't sound like an impending victory to me. So what are you lot up to?'

['A general would be unwise to reveal his strategy to the opposing forces,'] Staal said.

'That's true,' Andy said, thinking from a military perspective.

'Yeah. So let's have a go at inductive reasoning. Fifty thousand years of warfare is going to mean trillions of dead soldiers,' John reasoned.

'Oh trillions,' Eight agreed. 'At a million clones every four minutes, that's a lot of bodies. And the fleets, millions of ships.'

'Yeah, millions. All needing to be replaced when they get destroyed,' John continued.

Lucie leaned in close to Rose. 'It's like they're talking to themselves.'

Rose gave her a lopsided smile. 'They are.'

Eight was carrying on the thought processes. 'Takes a lot of resources to build that many ships.'

'And people to build them,' John said. He turned to the screen. 'So you and the Rutans have decimated the Mutter's Spiral. Cleared out all the resources.'

'So you start looking elsewhere for raw materials and slaves, and "hey presto", there's the Earth,' Eight said.

'Lots of raw materials and potential slaves, and not a hope of putting up any resistance. Ripe for the picking. How are we doing so far?' John asked Staal.

['Your speculations are pure fantasy,'] Staal told them.

'Yeah. If you say so,' John said dismissively. 'So if we're wrong, leave.'

['The General of the Tenth Sontaran Fleet does not take instructions from an adversary.']

'What about advice?' Eight asked. 'Does the General of the Tenth Sontaran Fleet take advice? Because I'm going to give you some alternatives, and I advise you to choose one of them. One. Just leave. No retreat, no surrender, so no disgrace,' Eight suggested.

['You think that leaving because you have been told to is not disgraceful?]

'Not if it is a sensible suggestion, no.'

'Or number two. You can attack us, taking your chances that you will win,' John said.

['Your puny missiles and nuclear weapons are harmless to the Sontaran fleet,'] Staal boasted.

'Or three,' Eight said in a cold, deliberate voice. 'Torchwood launch a pre-emptive strike and destroy you before you can attack.'

['Hah! As I have already mentioned, your weapons cannot harm us.']

'Y'reckon?' John said. 'I'm sending you a set of coordinates. I suggest you look in that direction.'

John nodded to Chrissie, and she activated the energy weapon. From various locations around London, five beams of green energy converged above the Thames, forming a single beam that shot out into space. A large telecommunications satellite that was no longer used, flashed in a brilliant ball of intense white light as it was atomised.

Yvonne turned on Andy. 'Captain! Why has a sworn enemy of the Crown and his associates been given access to one of our most powerful weapons?'

Before Andy could answer, John spun around and replied. 'Because that sworn enemy and his associates are trying to save the planet and every stupid person on it, including you. Now if you don't mind?' He turned back to the screen. 'Now General, I know that wasn't a missile.'

'And I know it wasn't nuclear,' Eight said.

'And we KNOW it wasn't puny. Any comment?' John asked.

['This primitive planet does not have the technology to build such a weapon,'] Staal announced.

'Oh, well that's all right then,' John said flippantly. 'So if we target your ship with this non existent weapon next, and fire in what . . ?' He looked at Eight.

'Thirty seconds?' Eight suggested.

John nodded thoughtfully. 'Say thirty seconds. Then nothing will happen.'

['But this is not possible.']

'You have twenty five seconds to get out of here General,' John said menacingly.

['We are not leaving. We will die in battle with honour,'] Staal announced.

'What?' John said incredulously. 'It won't be a battle, it will be a slaughter.'

['Then we shall make it a battle. Skree, train all weapons on the city below.'] Staal commanded.

'Staal. You only have fifteen seconds left! You can stop this,' John pleaded.

['Weapons primed and ready to fire General.']

['For the glory of Sontar. Fire in five.']

They could hear a chant in the background. ['Sontar-ha!']

'Staal. Please,' Eight pleaded. 'Think of your men. You don't have to do this.'

['Four. I am thinking of my men. The stories that will be told about them. They will be remembered as heroes.']

['Sontar-ha!']

'But you don't stand a chance. You'll be vaporised!' John told him desperately.

['Three . . . Sontar-ha. Two . . . Sonta . . .']

The screen suddenly went blank, with static coming from the speakers. Through the glass doors of the Despatch Office, a faint green glow lit the Standby Room from the windows that overlooked the Thames.

'What's happened?' Rose asked.

John and Eight looked along the control desk to the big red button which operated the energy weapon. River took her hand off the button and looked at them with a sad, but defiant expression. 'What . . ? Someone had to do it, and I knew you two never would.'

'But they didn't stand a chance,' John said.

'And neither would we if we'd have let them fire their weapons.'

* * *

'So, these are called TARDISes then?' Andy asked as he escorted the group of time travellers through the warehouse towards the blue wooden boxes.

'Shouldn't that be TARDI?' Rose asked with her teasing smile.

Eight frowned. 'But that would make them Time And Relative Dimensions In.'

'In what?' Andy asked.

'Space,' John told him. 'It's Time And Relative Dimensions In

Space.'

Andy faced the Eighth Doctor. 'And who are you Doctor? Really? The Torchwood Foundation Charter of 1879 names you as an enemy of the Crown, but you don't act like one.'

'He's not,' Lucie said with pride. 'He's a hero. Go on tell him. Tell him the things that we've done to save the world.'

Eight cleared his throat in a hesitant, embarrassed fashion. 'Well. The Nesteen consciousness animated those shop window dummies a few years back. Lucie and me took care of it.' He reluctantly continued as he wasn't sure how Andy would react. 'I did have to blow up that department store . . . sorry about that.'

'That was you two?' Andy asked.

'On the positive side though. He didn't have to blow up the London Eye, which was being used as a transmitter,' Lucie added helpfully.

'Hey! That was us,' Rose whispered to John.

'So, things that we've done in your lifetime,' Eight continued. There was the Slitheen. A family of skin wearing aliens who crashed that ship into the Thames . . .' Eight decided not to continue that story for obvious reasons.

'Yeah. We blew up number ten to stop them,' Lucie announced proudly.

'Yes. Sorry about that,' Eight said, giving his companion an annoyed look. 'But they were going to turn the Earth into radioactive slag. One of them escaped though and tried to melt Cardiff. Once again, Lucie and me stopped her.'

'Melt Cardiff?' McNab said with raised eyebrows. 'I know some people who would call that a public service.'

Rose tried unsuccessfully to stifle a laugh.

'Then there were the Sycorax hovering over London that Christmas,' Lucie reminded them.

'Ah, now I know that was us,' Andy said.

Eight gave him a disapproving look. 'Only after I'd negotiated a withdrawal and convinced them to leave.'

'Oh. Sorry about that,' Andy said with a shrug.

'And we stopped the Krillitane from cracking the Skasis Paradigm and controlling the whole of time and space,' Eight said. 'Er, had to blow up a school for that one . . . Sorry.'

'Okay. I get the picture,' Andy said. 'You're this planet's guardian angel . . . albeit a slightly destructive one.'

'Guardian alien more like,' John said.

'So why do you do it, when everyone here thinks you're the enemy?' Andy asked.

'I often ask myself that one,' Eight said with a sigh. 'At the present time, the human race is in its infancy. On the whole, you act like spoilt, spiteful children. But there are a rare few who have developed the neural pathways that raise them above the rest. Gandhi, Einstein, Mother Theresa, Hawking. Eventually, all the human race will develop these neural pathways and you will become magnificent, founding bountiful empires across the stars.'

'I look forward to it,' Andy said. 'I'll try and deflect the heat away from you.'

'That would help,' Eight said with a smile.

John held out his hand towards Andy. 'They might be different universes, but they're the same man. Thank you.'

Andy nodded and shook his hand. Rose leaned forward and kissed his cheek. 'Thanks Andy.'

'Yeah. Don't get all soppy on me. You're supposed to be a Special Operations Agent,' he said with pretend grumpiness.

Rose laughed. 'Our Andy never felt comfortable with the old regime either.' She saw Andy raise his eyebrows. 'Oh, he did his job and defended the Earth, but he never agreed with "if it's alien it's ours".'

'Who says I don't?' Andy asked defiantly.

'You do,' Rose told him. 'I can see it in your eyes. You can change it if you want to you know.'

'No. I'm just one man. It would take an army to change this organisation.'

John smiled. 'And yet here you are, one man helping an alien and his companion leave so that they can go on saving the world alongside you. I'd say that was progress.'

'Well, I suppose I could see if we can get your name taken off the charter.'

Eight held out his hand. 'Thank you captain. I hope we can meet in the future in more amicable circumstances.'

Andy shook his hand. 'Yeah . . . I'd like that.'

They looked at the TARDISes, or TARDI. (The jury was still out on that one.) Eight stroked the wooden panelling of John and Rose's TARDIS.

'So other universes have Time Lords and TARDISes then?' Eight said.

'Yeah, some of them,' John said. 'The one we live in doesn't. I grew our TARDIS from a coral fragment from our old universe.'

'Was that when you were formerly the Tenth Doctor?' Eight asked.

John gave a single laugh. 'Yeah.'

'Well, we'd better get out of here before Yvonne decides to evoke the Torchwood Charter . . . Thank you, for everything.'

John shook Eight's hand, and then the ladies kissed and hugged before they entered their TARDISes (TARDI), and disappeared from Canary Wharf.

In their TARDIS, John and Rose orbited the console, readying it for a trip through the Void. River sat on the jump seat, silently watching them.

'You all right?' Rose asked her as she looked up from the console.

'Oh, yes. I'm fine,' she lied. She was remembering how John and Eight had looked at her when she had pressed the button. She looked up at John. 'I'm sorry. But I know you have made decisions like that before. I know about Pompeii.'

John looked at the Time Rotor pumping up and down. She was right. Some days, it wasn't possible to get it right. 'Well, we'd better drop you off in the old universe before "other me" plugs the hole,' he said, drawing a line under the subject. He gave Rose an enthusiastic grin. 'Ready?'

Rose nodded, and John pulled the lever with a flourish. 'Allons-yyyyy'

'So. Where can we drop you?' John asked as the TARDIS stabilised.

'Can you do Easter Island, around ten eighty?' River asked and saw the questioning look on John's face. 'I have a date with a deity, and I don't want to be late.'

Rose laughed as John raised his eyebrows and pulled a disbelieving face. 'Easter Island it is then.'

The Time Rotor changed pitch and the TARDIS swayed through the Vortex to take them to Easter Island where it landed with a gentle "clomp".

'I think this is your stop,' John said with a smile. 'I'll just check the meter . . . That'll be one million, two hundred pounds, and fifty six pence please. Thank you for choosing TARDIS taxis.'

Rose snorted a laugh, and River smiled. 'Don't I get mates rates?'

John scratched the back of his neck. 'Welllll . . . Tell you what. Give me that Dimensional Manipulator and we'll call it quits.'

River rolled her eyes and took the tennis ball sized icosahedron out of her pocket. She threw it into the air a couple of times, contemplating whether to part with it, when John caught it on it's final descent.

'It's for the best,' John said. 'Don't want you calling us from another universe again, do we.'

'Oh I don't know. It might be fun,' River said with a saucy smile.

John put the ball in his pocket and strolled down the ramp to the doors. 'It sounds to me as though you've got plenty of fun ahead of you in this universe.' He opened the doors on an island paradise.

'Oh this is gorgeous,' Rose said as she stepped out and looked around. As she continued to search the terrain, she frowned. 'Hang on. Easter Island. Shouldn't there be stone heads?'

'Not yet sweetie. Their deity hasn't arrived yet,' River told her.

'Wha? You don't mean? No way!'

River waggled her eyebrows. 'Spoilers.'

'Well River. We'd better be going,' John said as he kissed her on the cheek. 'Look after yourself. Look after "other me". Have fun, and stay out of trouble.' He pointed a finger at her like a school teacher telling off a pupil.

'Well, three out of four ain't bad,' she replied with a cheeky grin.

John laughed. 'That'll have to do. Bye River.' He turned around and went back into the TARDIS.

River turned to Rose, who was waiting to say her own goodbye. 'It's been a pleasure to meet you River. I'd even say an education.'

'And it's been a pleasure to meet you too Rose. He talks about you a lot.'

'Really?'

'Yes. You made a big impression on him. You saved him, made him better,' River told her, holding her hands. 'And for that, I thank you.'

'Y'know, I wasn't sure I wanted to meet ya when I first heard about ya. But havin' met ya, I know the Doctor is in good hands.' Rose pulled her into a hug and kissed her cheek. 'Bye River, and keep a handle on him, won'tcha.'

'Oh I will. Even when he doesn't want me to. Bye Rose.'

Rose rubbed River's upper arm, turned, and stepped into the TARDIS. She walked up the ramp as John activated the Time Rotor, and she started to set the controls to get them home. She was mulling something over in her mind.

'Won't this meetin' change how River reacts when she sees ya in The Library?' she asked.

John stopped what he was doing and looked up, thinking about that encounter.

"Thanks."

"For what?"

"The usual. For coming when I call."

"Oh, that was you?"

"You're doing a very good job, acting like you don't know me. I'm assuming there's a reason."

'She thought I should know her. Thought that was a bit odd at the time. But now, that kinda makes sense.' He thought further through that conversation.

"Okay, shall we do diaries, then? Where are we this time? Er, going by your face, I'd say it's early days for you, yeah? So, er, crash of the Byzantium. Have we done that yet? Obviously ringing no bells. Right. Oh, picnic at Asgard. Have we done Asgard yet? Obviously not. Blimey, very early days, then. Whoo, life with a time traveller. Never knew it could be such hard work. Look at you. Oh, you're young."

"I'm really not, you know."

"No, but you are. Your eyes. You're younger than I've ever seen you."

"You've seen me before, then?"

"Doctor, please tell me you know who I am."

'Actually, when I think about it. It was this meeting she was talking about when we met in The Library,' John realised. 'Whoo, life with a time traveller. Who'd have thought it could be such fun.'

'Me for one,' Rose said with a cheeky grin.

He gave his wife a warm smile. 'Ready to go home?'

'Always,' Rose replied.

 **The End**


End file.
